IRREVOCABLY LOVED;030709

sick in the mind!

2011-05-22T23:25:00.000-07:00

From the previous post i've written "Everything sucks! " well you should that is true.Things sucks nowadays, especially when a special is around the corner but you're just not getting what you want.This coming Wednesday is my birthday.But i think is going to be the worst and hell-like birthday celebration.Just going to stay in my own room and watch all kinds of DVD's or movies i can find.i know.BORING!

Aku ble jadi gila duduk rumah untuk 7 bulan straight.Ape nak jadi pun aku tak tau.Nti aku kat dalam bilik je, kau mengamok, tk suka, nak amik hp,ckp uat bill.pastu masih terperuk dlm bilik nak amik tv, tk tau tgk tv kt lua sama2, pastu ape katil? KLAKAR SIAK!

The problem is i've got no vacancy. So stop pestering me.What can i do, the school say no means no lah, if already school cant accept, what more poly.. don't be ridiculous.i want private O can? complain bout the cost.SO? tell me uh tell me! And now im stuck at home for like the whole of 7months.no money don't come to me.

Fucking bullshit!

im out of here!FYCK!

after a long time/-

2011-05-22T01:09:00.001-07:00

EVERYTHING SUCKS!

breaking up...

2011-02-01T22:14:00.000-08:00

Alot had got into our way, as you know.Now..maybe its slowly stopping,but maybe are okay for you, but its not right for me.Im sorry

Obviously,what's getting on my nerves is your work.Poor organised shift schedule.super poor and pathetic.Never heard of a working place with this kind of last minute schedule.HA HA

And its also obvious that both making an effort to take the midnight meets.But very sorry had to leave early.well, i would rather REACH HOME EARLY AND MEET MORE THAN MEET FOR A LONGER TIME AND ONLY ONCE(:

Seriously..i dont know what else to say.What I do , i still don't feel satisfied. Just look at your shitty work place,its super nonsensical siaa! i still don't understand why is it like that, and worst you don't even know your schedule, you own schedule!

Im out of words! seriously! What else can go wrong! I hate this! i truly hate this!\

I want to leave you to grab your own happiness and find someone who can actually give you your peace of mind,you dont want that and i dont understand why.i have enough of hurting you.cant you see that im posting bout me being so agitated of hurting you and not you hurting me?can you?? ya allah, im going crazy you knoooooow!

JUST STOP EVERYTHING!! *cries*

naaaaaaa

2011-01-29T06:31:00.000-08:00

Yes, long time since i last update.

Lots happened,and still sober.Damn right,im still struggling to get through it with patience.
But it keeps coming on and on.Just having a hard time for now, like right na,this month .*so much for a new year*

Having extra number coming to my house.Clearly known EXTRA WORK.
Patience is all i need..strength too..IM FED UP D:

Work? Been doing night shift, now as yup above...seriously seh... bingit tau! bingit!
Doing work at night especially when other workers don't wish to co-operate and keep ordering others , things that can be done quick and end early slows down, she is who i meant, in her own world and thinking she's got the rank! puh-lease! you can dream on okay?C:

As for you..
Lots been coming between us, and i know its hard. Harder for me as you know im weak.Everything i said, its harsh and i may mean what i say,not like you just know me yesterday,you know pretty well.So now i should say,i make it sound harsh but i dont mean what i say.it hurts me alot when i dont get what i want from you or with you. And that's when small think it became a fuss ,FOR ME. i know, just bare with it, But you've changed to what i see.Honestly, you've change into a different shit! And i hate that!I hate who the hell you are now! you get it! Im strong with other and outside away from you,but when im in front of you, im like total WEAK bitch! You're a non caring person with me now.you just heck care with me.you dont entertain me anymore. you dont tell me things. you lie to me.you pushed me aside.you prioritise work before me!what the fuck am i to you?you're not him anymore!you dont change,you get out of my fucked up alright?!thanks for what you've done and what i said otp, you got what you want.Idk what else to say lah...
can we cut this crap? can we end this? can we forget it? can we start afresh? can just... STOP IT! ??? CAN WE??? I LOVE YOU OKAY I DO!

never ending.

2010-12-31T18:22:00.000-08:00

Fucking disappointed and ditched!!

hurtifying

2010-12-29T04:35:00.000-08:00

obviously i know that two days is nothing compared to five days. But that doesnt mean you have to lie.It's always the case that i'll find out things when you're asleep.Thank god for that but,damn it to you.I was actually cool but it really triggered me to compare what was said by you and told by others.that sentence you said was superb hurtful, lucky i can still handle it. Like i said idk whats with you,but let's put it to a stop.Now i can see that you've changed and not me.I can really see that i've changed but some of the habits is still in you.I dont mind that,but i hate what happened earlier,you screamed,yes you SCREAMED at me! Empty promises are serial killers.please stop it,not with me alright.You very well know i've got lots to catch up with you,so now im standing up to you,but i can also see things are just not allowing us to do that.ape lagi yg you want to give it to me? ya,allah give me strength to face all this...im really stuck in the middle which is the good and bad side..

when the time arrive...

2010-12-18T19:04:00.003-08:00

Actually kn, two days can make me crazy but because the strength i pulled high in me to refrain myself from getting into my room was a good solution.Easy said but yes,i succeed(:

Coming home today would the best the day i warm-welcome you(: you know imma' hug you when you're there next to me dude!Overcome something which i dont need to? HECK!

Had a great dinner with my family last night!(: BBQ CHICKEN :B tender chicken and affordable for a family meal(:

Grabbed more than three chips,haha! once in a lifetime babe! (:

Calculated,$128 was confirmed(: Shopping! Calling! Gifts! SUPERB!(:

God not even a month,what the heck does the operator trying to get me into sia..?! the privileges i got not even over yet, beh ni mcm eh....lucky its not even a warning or any negative respond,was just told and CUT DOWN!!!

Most of the time sarcasm really is a serial killer.I hate when you start talking,just try to be more polite and i'll appreciate that alot. cause by being sarcastic to me, im telling now,it wont change a thing you're demanding to me(:

im sorry,but stop irritating me,cause you are perishable to me...stop.

insyallah..

2010-11-24T16:59:00.001-08:00

The lectures and advise you gave had already sunked in my head for a very long time.But i find that you are at the same time trying to demoralize me.i get what's my mistake,thanks for reminding me to not repeat the same mistake,but its not encouraging me either.You want things like last time,im making that time.But are you?maybe you do not know how much it really cut my veins for waiting for you as long as four hours when i could go home and sleep and study and all,i choose to wait for you but what's the result? 5 mins?? that's seriously sucks.i can't too much.im sick, not feeling well,like i can just turn off like any moment.don't say you appreciate,because that's just words.I get that iim always texting around you,but..now you are,a revenge to me? astaraghfirullah.*if i spell that right* I will accept that.where's the time given when you're at home?sure to be a reason,why you can't.What am i now?where can i go to. everyone's like so busy,and im trying to find someone who can actually help me,HELP ME not ENJOY WITH ME! like stated in facebook,i'll be normal, but you'll be worrying.i dont want that to happen.because it'll not be pretty.stop demoralizing me u, stop! it hurts.will you get tired crying very night?

insyallah, everything will be fine.im very sensative now.just anything can hurt me.i haate being fucked up with you.tk bgs.sorry but i have to go off. continue later at night.

something that i just can't accept it

2010-11-23T04:48:00.000-08:00

One thing.Feeling excited the whole day of the plan,planned.

Second,spent like four hours at qilah place to wait for you and entertained myself by watching DVD's

Third,bad news came up and had to settle it.

okay okay, here's the thing, waited for four hours at someone place is super embarassing and i had to make myself a thick skin pal to just kill time, or else, im nowhere.

Super sad i had to leave you at a very quick time.i was already crying,cause it hurts.It really hurts for you to leave just like that,it HURTS alot.

You came back,when you don't have to.maybe you don't know my attitude that even if im being sulky i expect you to come back but you're acting as if you just known me yesterday. )=

I loitered around,i was feeling very down,when you came(: thanks for cheering me up. i appreciate it,but sorry if i've let it out,THAT'S ABIT OF WHAT YOU FACED. consider yourself lucky(: I get scolding coming home late,but it was worth it.im ): but also (: get it?

haiz, i don't know lah, to you, im not understanding,but to me, you're there...which one is right also im confused with.

Right now, i can still feel the stretch of the veins near my eyeballs as i have already poured alot earlier,but who cares.im just waiting for my buddy to online,hmm if you're too long,i might have to go offline as im very tired,haiz, strained eyes.. ):

I changed to be a quiet person,but it's only for a while, i want it to last longer as so i wont be easily heart broken.hmmm, certain things i can be demanding ah, but it wont happen if one dont do anything wrong.

i hope we could be much more happier and no arguements.seriously im tired,IM TIRED!
THANKS(:

sometimes , someday

2010-11-20T21:06:00.000-08:00

I hope things are going to be better soon.finally the attitude of 'talking things out' is in me.I talk things out and problems are settled properly, but certain things im still not satisfied please forgive me for being not being satisfied.I feel like crying but it really hurts to ave those tears rolling down my cheeks.im weak, im sorry.

Right now thinking when shall i start to revise as tomorrow is mama test,gosh how can i forget that.I guess im improving alil, im studying hard and i manage to answer almost 95 percent of the questions in the test although Mr Tong english sucks! (:

Hungry!i need cheese fries!my goood! i don't know why i've been craving for cheese fries even after having one to myself.Yesterday had fish/chicken like burger -.0' nyeh! :B

OMG! i must admit,i miss fizah!even after meeting her during raya haji, for a day, is not enough.
Fizah aku rindu kau!

kay skrg, tk tau nak uat ape.. kay lah bye! (:

2010-11-20T05:49:00.001-08:00

This is like the second post, im writing. firstly im bored and secondly, i just feel like writing out my feelings.

As usual,mum came from work, first thing first, nag,second had to clear my flooded balcony, like super annoying.

enough of that, now this:
yes as i said on fb, im not with you, but somethings you do can really hurt me so bad that what i've told myself was true, maybe i shouldn't say or talk anything because it doesn't matter.Like seriously , it doesn't matter.AT ALL!Ya up to you ah, what you want to do,but its normal for people to take a glance,not like i want to see but it appeared on the facebook homepage.Its annoying ah...i really don't know what to say..seriously its up to you,i hack care with what you're going to do.But i should also admit, i still do care alil inside, but i don't show,what do you know? you know nothing, nothing at all.I don't blame you,but it really hurts alot.you know when i say something its all a lie.but i don't think you even care.bak kata org melayu"buat ape terkejar kejar, kalau org lain dah tak nak" btol sgt sgt lah tu!...

So, is this your revenge to me?huh? doing what i did that can make you sad, to me? please ah that's childish,already i find you desperate.im trying to get back to normal but it wont work if you keep hurting me...not physically ah, but inside sia.maybe im still caring bout it, where else i shouldn't be.appreciate that im still caring rather then like what you said, end it like how we started,STRANGERS . i hate that,so don't make me do it.im trying to forget things but it wont work if ou keep bringing up the past,im trying to see you as a changed person but it wont allow me if you keep behaving like an asshole.u see that ASSHOLE!

i need u; you weren't there
i love you; do you?
im jealous; you're not
im lonely; you're busy
just leave me if you cant make it.
PLEASE,DON'T HURT ME

kenape..

2010-11-19T21:50:00.000-08:00

Well, getting bored at home..but can't do anything..

Sorry that i can't meet you today,we'll try some other days okay? please don't be sad.Im trying also.

Texted mum what time she come home so i can go out for awhile to meet a friend,but, no reply.. sadsad D:

i hate heavy rains and end up flooding my balcony , GRR!

seriously, tkde kerje skrg, mendak sioool!

Tomorrow sunday, monday school, now can go to school thursday back to normal, cause work starts at 3 and fridays too..sians...

ape lagi..?ohh

it truly irritates me! like seriously..stop it ah.Maybe you thought is just asking asking, and keep repeating that "one day the truth is out" irritating ah irritating.not only one, but a few,bug him? for what?tak perlu eh okaay? :D forget bout the low profile thing we've planned, its no use already,if it becomes a issue,i dont know what to say.but im out of the group to discuss bout it.i hope you can stop it. cause its IRRITATING and i dont wish to speak up no matter how hard you try to persuade or dig it, alright! :D i will shut my mouth,anw, if you know already why still ask? asl? scared if its not true?then dont ask lagi ah,its simple (: Lucky im going off soon.satu masalah, dari pada satu.try your best lah okay?:D cause it wont leak from me(:

blurps!

2010-11-17T16:52:00.000-08:00

Its been a while, i haven't update my blog and so coming to facebook and MSN.

The reason why? computer bitches and crashed! Laptop was sent for service, while it still have that one year warranty thing.Uhuh (;

Now that i can come online,blogging and fb-ing, no one's on ): But it's okay.they're schooling? and working? blurgh!

By right, now im having class, but i don't feel like going.. lazy? but later working, heh! :B attitude baiiikkk! (:

Obviously i've been missing someone so badly, we need to meet ): like seriously, but you're super busy and tired, so.. it's okay? ):I can just WAIT.

Yesterday raya haji, was average? boring at first house, second house cousin's are there, but watched tv and not talking much,third house super boring, but loved her sotong sambal! :D Mum was looking at batik lepas,for occasion later in december, gosh, i hope i can walk properly with that batik lepas.haha! (:

Even if i look relax kan,im still thinking seh...how am i going to get it done,is it appropriate or not.susah lorr!!nvm, there is a way! *(:

Do you still love me? Do you still need me? am i still there in your heart? am i still the lucky one?do u think of me when you go to sleep? I STILL LOVE YOU,DON'T LEAVE ME OUT );

haaa(:

2010-11-12T18:46:00.000-08:00

Been working on thursday and friday..can say tiring ah, cause doing two things in one day and not eating? yeaah(:

i get what i need on thursday! Wax jeans! superb! Thanks bestfriend ! (: But it was hard to find,nyeh =.=??

Yesterday friday, had test and SW was cancelled,thanks ah siaaaa! i came with SW attire and no PE.then test was "AWESOME" yeah, group discussion,nyahahaha! :B alahh.mama biasa ah..

Something i've told or intended to do really make me happy,cause it putted a smile and excited on my mum(: i hope this would be the best gift ever(: but ah...money havent come to me... ): tk sabar nii.i thought it would be a bad idea , cause my to my parents would be a waste of money and blah blah, but ah! instead of accepting the phone, mum wants the original casing ordered online which i dont know how much! like what my friend say, going to BANKRUPT soon,nyahaha(: But to me its okay, its my own parents (:

PS: where's the time im looking for? i understand but, i hope its not forever. yes i had fun spending time with you, but half way you tell me those change of plans really hurts me,alot. first you said that and now this? been really looking forward for a longer time spent.im sure you've seen roughly how am i fed up? that's not all.im controlling,and i dont know show.i also dont want any negative things to happen when we're together.haiz, i seriously dont, know, yesterday my heart just crashed so bad.i dont wish to cry on alternate nights anymore,please . what are we sehh? ):

no one know's.

alright alright

2010-10-30T23:05:00.000-07:00

Just finish cooking with my hilarious mum (: had a good time together ! ill miss that...

Oh something lame to tell...we bought a new washing machine! cool kan? Now i don't have to hand wash my school uniform(:

Went to market earlier.Trust me, it was super pack although its 12! While i was paying my last goods..my boss from previous attachment called me, i was shock but happy, maybe i get a good position..! haha, lamee!They are in need of workers due to the change of shop and venues.experienceee worker pleaseee!! (:

Finally,im beginning to relax with problems,or i'll be much more depressed.Its really tiring you should know.My eyes are swollen, as well as my gums.I'm glad we've settled our problems and we're fine now (: friends alright ! (: And as for you, i love you and we're be loving each other for a long time alright,what ever happens, i love you still..let's compromise and make time.

I LOVE YOUU!! (=

Im still struggling,i know he's with me

frus again..

2010-10-29T02:53:00.000-07:00

Okay things are going out of hand at times..That shouldn't have happened.But we can compromise, do we?

calling someone a bitch or a whore was the worst thing to do,i hope it's all out of anger,but why must it always happened in front of me?

I've avoided the person,but seems like it's your turn.What does this mean?Is it going to be a revenge or does it happen for a reason?

Now what? good? bad? oh god... im super helpless, why can't we just start all over again, and stop all this very challenging problems.

Helpless.Diagnose.Lonely.Miserable.FUCK!

I want everything alright...

frus lagi !

2010-10-26T03:14:00.000-07:00

I know im being irritating , and i myself do not know why..
Sorry ah lau dah menyusahkan hidup u..!
So why not.. now.. like right now.. i make my move!
your life will be at ease and no problematic causes!
FUCK LAH!

Practical earlier was super boring...did nothing, but some ice bath test for POTATOES!!??
Sorry to say ah, but the teacher also......B**INGG!!
But ended early, that's good ah, heh :B

Alik je mengamok! ingat aku tkde cerita lain pe?! I had enough and i already told you, i dont know why, so stop asking me ah sial!Too bad you already said it! and I'll OBEY that.. (=
I guess its over...

headache headache headache!! bye lah!

phooo =.='

2010-10-24T00:14:00.000-07:00

Earlier was boringg.my music? re-played like more than 10 times?! yeah,uhaa (:

Only at three i get to use the lappy. My eyes are half open, because was sleeping earlier..sleepy gileeee....brrrr :/

And now , not really chatting cause someone is busy....just wait ah..again half sleepy and hungry? haha.nonsense kn...munched something,abit more awake,keep eating lah...

besok, school but havent wash my uniforms...later ill get it done..(:

hungry hungry hungry!! CHEESE FRIES?? :D okay i seriously don't know why i've been wanting cheese fries okay. just that ...it's....NICE! :B

kay... now im still thinking wether to watch a movie or not... because almost all of the movies i've watched...alamak!

I MISS YOU LAHH! BILE MAU JUMPE LAGI, DAH NAK FLAT LINE...! BOOHOO!! ):

frustrated!!

2010-10-23T02:27:00.000-07:00

im super super frustrated with something which i've been taking care of...haizz.. why sia why?!! ):
cut it!

Now and exciting news was confirmed today, hmm 24..dec... haiz, must i get sick again?? NOT!
cut it!

People love me i guess, been asking me like a thousand times when am i coming back, but i'll have to wait for the right time.sorry guys! :S But if there's nothing getting in my way, sure i'll be there (=

Sekarang kn, byk susah tau! dari pada satu ke satu! haiz, okay, seriously im still frustrated with certain things...u! why are you dead! dont lah! its only a year! then that bitch! why? nothing disturb u! beh? ape? update?FISH MAYNE!

tk fair, afiq kua, i can't! haha but it's okay what's the use of phone and internet right?? yeah, but not same lahh... nvm...anw, still kecoh bout timetable,yg mana senang untuk krg dtg, tapi choose not to.haiyo..skrg kene tukar...must change that means!NYAHAHA! go..DIE!

i miss you,very much. all this while we meet each other was not enough, a longer time please.and and...privacy? thank you! not say disturbed but...coincidence lah *kasi chance* We seriously need to make time,haaaaaa.....ble jadi gile ta-u! eh u..u did something yg i never expect seh...kk shhh! when can we both go back to school together? i miss those times...nak hug nak kiss nak be with you!! i nak i nak!!....kay lah im sad bye... ):

and now... i should say that i've eaten but hungry again, i tried not to eat alot, but stomach's nagging.. whaaatttt..HAHA. oh i miss my friend bestfriend idra, where kau? dah busy nan boyfriend aku pun kau tk pandang eh,pantat!...

QC, i need to read up, like seriously what cock she talking never go into my brain,and what's in mind..? CHEESE FRIES!! (= i dont know lah... craving for one i guess..buy me anyone i'll loooooooovveeee youuuuuuuuuu :B

chatting,boredd,hungry grr... ;) high cut shoes ): bag ? not really...wax jeans!!!

Toufu dog!! BYE!!

I LOVE YOU (:

too numerous to count

2010-10-16T23:07:00.000-07:00

I remember 16.10.2010

A hang out?? or a ......uhmmm*thinks* o.0"

had fun, but noisy stomach..almost hit by a ball..lucky im saved..thanks love!

Im not a GUY! GIRL OKAY ...GIRL!

That too numerous to count is my line, and stated on facebook hah..

My ppaid low, i hate it. got to wait for along time for me to topup tau..lamee....nvm try it on tuesday aye ?(:

Again im trying my best to settle things, please don't make it hard for me... help me not condemn me.. you want me to stop but what are you doing? you're making me irritated... i was expecting you to help me and not condemn and .... really,if u do feel like leaving things behind i don't mind..if im such a troublesome to you and never right at what i always do.. ): please sah....

Gosh, am i going to be stuck like this forever?like ever...? help me? anyone...? im already down with someone i shouldnt be...i need to concentrate with me studies,pass this freaking FQC.damn lahh.. tk tau lah ape lagi nak tambah masalah....!

FCUK LAH! BYE!

i love you(:

oh my sheeeeeeeeeeeeppp! :/

2010-10-09T22:42:00.001-07:00

one thing.. noissssyyyyyy!
My three cousin, the triplets are here at my place, and they're super noisy,i agree with mum that boys are much more noisy when comes to playing games,any sorts of games.
I really wonder are they playing games with eyes and mind or ..MOUTH! what they're playing XBOX =.=' weird right??? @.@!

right now, me and mum are trying to control our patience and anger,why? unhappy bout somethings. Shall not say it,later...KECOH !

Again i wish ..will there be cheese fries falling down from the baby blue orange whatever sky?? *its afternoon*im craving for cheese fries lahhh..
Haven't eat ah, that's why...HUNGRY!!

Oh gosh,im saying this again, i f**king miss you too!!! we got to meet up like seriously.. hmmppfftt :/ i though of meeting you just now,but i don't think there's time uh..im sorry dearest )=

WAHH SUPER NOISY, I CAN'T STAND IT! GET OUT KIDS!! BUT!!! they're lovely too (=

Tomorrow's the big day for all AFS studs(= atts and QC shitty module and coming of school after atts.DREADFUL.....ahuh =.='

Im bored )= no one chatting with me...
okay lah tkde pape lagi, my little friends are already calling me...booyah! (=

haizz

2010-10-09T05:52:00.000-07:00

This is my second post =.='

Super bored;

waited for a friend to come online i guess i have slept for more than 5 hours.
where can you be friend?? o.-?

Hungry hungry hungry..food food food.. where are you?? *stomach growls*

you want to know what 'ive been doing? fighting with my brother to use the net! @.@!
irritating tau.

Nak keluarrr !!! *bangs head on the wall*

ay! i miss you lah! bile mau jumpe?? nak mati ni :-L

Ahhh boredd sakk !!

Sometimes i don't know why, i miss you badly, but i can't say it or tell.It's like im looking at someone who is giving me the hand language... you tell, you die! But im very sure you on your own would know if i miss you or not,maybe through how i talk to you, or how i behave like.It's been long i haven't meet you, for me it maybe long ah..so when i get to meet you... in a word heaven! seems like i got to grab in my arms soon..!! watch out ! :P

Plus,things are getting out of hand girl,you've cause a trouble which can cause a fatal accident.You don't see that do you? because you're such a stupid person, who doesn't think whats the consequences! S T U P I D !! I so hate what you've done, if anybody gets heart attack for your doings, your life is going to be just the same and as perfect as hell...PANTAT!

will there hamburgers falling down the awesome blue black sky? *uhm,its night time, :)*

Ish! i still can't take it with you! bye lah! :@

huh?

2010-10-08T23:32:00.000-07:00

sometimes, i don't get you. sometimes i get you.
what exactly do you want? Just spit it!

Im trying to get to you,but you won't let me.
So what you want me to do? >:-(

Stop giving others problem, or you'll get double.
fix your own broken glass! :x

I understand you, but please don't cry =(
I can't stand seeing you cry =(

i want to meet you too =(
but we'll have to wait ..

we need to take more pictures! (=
hang out more! (=

everything's starting again, but you're away..
please come back =(

idk why but i like this picture (=

Is that real??

2010-10-06T19:30:00.000-07:00

Look! what you've read is obvious it's my feelings alright? I didn't expect you'll read it, but..that's the honest feelings i had,i don't know but we're over it now.

hmmm,im glad that dad's home already.But im afraid to talk to him, as i wasn't in good terms with mum,just don't want my dad's BP to go up again.yup, super not good when you're not in good term with your parents, you'll feel guilty as well as hurtful,because harsh words are throwed at you like that, i mean repeatedly okay..what ever with hat, we're fine now.

Today.. friends coming back from penang...sure they had fun... earn extra knowledge there.missed AQILAH of course(: After sending them to airport, lucky i've got company home,took bus as usual,super long waitt.....!!

I just need you to explain why you did that,highly shock :S ... you don't have to apologize cause it's not your fault, if i didn't have asked you wouldn't do it, and i guess that's a bad dream for you.I'm confuse ..like totally confused,mixed up feelings.what ever ah.....

damn! Oct 11 is just around the corner...get back to school and the most boring subjects ever! not sure if i can even concentrate with the teachers different atts! its FQC and FSH,aghhh! thanks sia FQC ...never liked (: what to do study je lahhh....

you,going for attachment.do well and get good grades.im sure you're able to.just do what they ask you to.but never show atts cause you might be send back to school, that sucks! i can't see you again,sadsad course,but keep in touch ): hurhur .... if we could've known each other since January *boohoo* nvm... i wish every happiness and study hard, don't flirt! I'll slap and pinch you.

just send you hugs and kisses and misses here (: *hugs && kisses && misses && pinches*

taking care (:

what a wait..

2010-10-01T20:32:00.000-07:00

Maybe its hard for you...

Maybe you don't want to let me know...

Sorry to say that i have found the answer myself...

I wonder why is it like this...

If im such a disturbance tell me ah...

I KNOW IT ALREADY DUDE! YOU SUCK!YOU'RE NEVER HONEST,I SAW IT NOW,I SAW IT DAMN IT!

NEVER EVER FIND ME AGAIN!!!!!!

patience and strength to stand strong...

2010-09-25T21:39:00.000-07:00

First of all Alhamdullilah everything went well , yesterday had open house for all relatives but sadly most of them didnt turn up...but things went well.... thanks to Cik Lin fr helping and my mum,you've been great! (:

this year, its been more of a admitted and committed year..
-admitted to hospital for my belove dad & grandmother. Well its a tough job to be strong and being for them at the same time facing all kinds of attitude, especially old folks, but it's okay, that... we have to go through no matter what. everyone and every child will have to face that, when their parents get old, and its our responsibility,well.. i the firm attitude i have, was observed from mum, and being commited was taught by mum (:
-committed,i have to committed with house chores and stuff, as my mum faced enough problems,and as a older sister ,daughter and first child.. i have to help in anyways...its my responsibility to help out anything has got to with family, and that will help me prepare in the future.

well,right now, in hospital,acute stroke ward,accompanying my dad,its super worrying for us(mum,brother&me) he can't think too much or worry,or else BP goes up. it all happen because of me.I did something and got angry and there goes the BP. im really upset with myself.and all i could yesterday for meeting him the last time at home was to just prepare the food,mum ordered for open house as my dad didnt had the chance to taste and write a small note for him saying im sorry....well the repsond i had from mum, was he kept quiet and teared.i was worried at home,and i could just pray hard,i hope alah, will help us through and give each of us the strength we need throughout.

i reached here at about 12 just now, and i salam my dad, and hugged,i teared feeling that i regret being a rascal . My parents faced enough trouble from me and brother. so we should really be a grown up. so ya... im trying my best to change and be a responsible daughter and a young adult(:

okay enough of myself and whats about my dad,it just makes me feel very guilty and i don't want to cry in front of all patients here, super embarassing and haha! it'll be awkward .

kay lah thts all lah ... you young people out there, appreciate your parents never let them down and always respect them, love them and never leave them before they leave you..

i love you parents..

maggots...living

2010-09-13T03:25:00.000-07:00

sucks!

what a frustrating luck...

2010-08-24T02:43:00.000-07:00

All i can say is...things i wished and hoped for, was not meant to be....

Taking turns will never harm your life!

Please be initiative!

Thanks alot for helping!

ahum...

2010-08-21T20:46:00.000-07:00

Been busy for the whole week back and forth to bedok and hospital.A day off would be fine with me,yes saturday and sunday,well...that's because im not feeling well....thanks (:

missing school much.meeting my friends.going out early morning just to meet my love(: Holiday was abit boring but fine. The best part of this holiday, i have a taste of being a nurse to my grandma! cool kan?? (: okay lah, nothing much to handle,except for toilet breaks.pufft

Very much waiting for saturday the 4th sep to come soon,cause that's when i get to bully my bestfriend and have a night out with him(: kan idra? hahaha(: Much to plan about.Also waiting for 3rd sep to come too!! (:

Been breaking my fast at hosp, trust me i also feel like a patient? but better food,had to think of a different menu everyday,can be boring without fizah there, i will always wait for her to come after work.

Had no idea why should we argue when we can just let it go.im sorry short cake ):

what ever,im excited for saturday serious!!!! i miss you short cake! want to meet you soon.

i miss idra,short cake,my cliques,everyone...!!

kay lah take care kay?

waiting area..

2010-08-15T20:42:00.001-07:00

As i said things are going too fast, so here we are today at KK hospital, waiting for my belove grandma, everythings going just fine....Glad me and mum reached early to see her, because right now she's at day surgery, and there's no way i can see her until the whole op is finished. a relief though....

Two weeks of holidays finally started, not much of plans, will be busy at hosp i guess.Just a plan with friends. At least get to wake up late , no school!! on saturday, i overnight at my grandma place, two of my cousins were there, including my auntie,for the first night i was there grandma was still at home, the night i left not sure how granddad managed his sleep, cause grandma was already admitted. im sure he's strong,but the sad part was, he always had his side on bed and place to sit at dining table, side to pray, but instead he do everything on grandma side...i couldnt hold back my tears but i had to. well.... pray hard yea...

A plan with my friends was to actually break fast outside,idra my long lasting bestfriend,was told that we're break fasting at geylang,very high class and legendary place to spent.But its okay.im sure it'll be fun.. (: right now just waiting ya, half way texting syg.. but it's okay, im sure he's already at work...take care syg, he's very sleepy,but he have to hold on...take care syg.. i love you lots (:

the day of all prayers...

2010-08-13T18:56:00.000-07:00

Today the saturday, all of my cousins and aunties and uncles will be gathering at grandma house for breakfast.we'll all gather and make sure we are there for her,even if it will be the last time.Doa selamat will be organized.

Monday will be the day my grandma is going for her operation, diagnose of cancer.i hope everything will be fine and nothing comes in the way. im very sure god is always by her side and supporting her.All she have to do is be strong and have faith,no matter what happens our family is there waiting for her outside.

As for granddad, heard that he wants to accompany my grandma,but he is not able to move about always or he'll have his blood pressure high.but we'll try our very best to bring him there and see his beloved wife. i know everyone of us is in a tense situation, but im very sure all this happens for a reason.

All im tryingto do was,to get myself to recover from my irritating flu, high fever and now that is getting worst is my sore throat,i have a man 'voice' ...not!

Holiday started, already scheduled my plans, obviously for the first week,will be accompanying my grandma in the hospital,and maybe to sleep over there .Also to clear the house and get kuih stuff ready,apparently this fasting month pass by fast,not as always was, so raya is like just a week away,but for now, not in the mood yet.

exams are coming, study but nothing goes into the brain, distractions everywhere.Sad to say i even failed my SW test,when i never had problems with SW.

kay,just waiting for syg to wake up, and talk to him... wake up soon honey!

more of good things...

2010-08-09T01:11:00.000-07:00

life saviour!!! thanks sayang! (: 2 bucks added!

things around not been great,worries everywhere,compromise.oh god,please help us ):

i can't a solution to us,but i just hope that,things will be better,had no idea what's wrong..but am i at fault?..things been questioning in my head,but you see it? no...

about friends,having problems that they are not comfortable with me.so am i too rough? too open? too exagerate? tell me at least, don't just back off like that. Never mind, maybe one day a right friend that can actually suit me will come to me . just hope that its not too long to wait.

im jealous to look at you with what you have now.but all i can do was to shut my eyes from looking at those.I know im not as free as you,but sometimes,i already have the chance with me,but it wont happen.thanks for the encouragement you've given,seems like i'll just have to keep on waiting...hmmm...

am i part of the group? am i considered as the book worm too? or am i jsut disrupting you guys? tell me...

much to update.

2010-08-07T23:05:00.000-07:00

Much to update...

Last 3rd was the 13th greatest day ever,but didn't spent it well.late for school but its worth it,i hope the next time,it'll be a good and better hang out.Im sorry dear,but hey,we've made it.All the way dear. I wonder when will we start having a ring on our fingers? long wait heh? (:

Fasting month is coming,a wonderful month that every muslims are looking forward to.what more the month after that? much more exciting,green packets! but thats beside the point.it's okay, get yourself clean and pure and this coming wednesday onwards(:

Been waiting to have a pair of high cut show of my own.Almost had one but,my mum didn't make it happen.Another long wait i have to endure. *sigh* But i do believe that if i wait , i'll get something better.hmmm,no choice but have to wait.

Things in school are going more and more awkward,as i was observing how the group is going around.But it's okay right...i mean things happen for a reason.But not sure if things will go back like it used to be.And im sure,we could've compromise but instead we turn our faces away. Okay.. this is all up to you,but im just a friend there,nothing much i could do,i thought you make it looked like it was my fault that we're not together.but whatever it is, i guess you've found someone new. a new friend.thanks btw.

Things are like going out of hands.Im sorry . im lost,im positive im lost.I just hope things will be better and our friendship won't tarnish just because of a guy.haaaa...it's very difficult though.

im out of words.bye

a week to miss

2010-06-17T17:55:00.000-07:00

dear sayang,
It's only three days and im missing like hell, trust me not this day only just on the first day,im already dying...and your bestfriend zufar ,didnt had the chance to stop me from crying....

i remembered the first day you went off,it was raining cats and dogs,the whole day i was worried sick bout you.i wonder if you're wet and safe and eaten lunch and shelter...worried sick alright!

well, its already Friday and hope that Tuesday comes fast...just entertaining myself with the same old thing...laptop,TV,songs,games... :/ i can get sick of this...maybe i also wished to go back to school so i could meet you outside after your work or maybe your off-day... (:

SAYANG PLEASE COME BACK ):

This is what i feel like writing,because i feel very lonely without you with me, i could then understand how much your company can mean to me.I know I've sometimes pushed you aside,but somehow i feel lost now.. without you with me.. ): i know that being with me is the only thing you'll always wished for,and im having that feeling now,i do wonder sayang,do i have to feel like this only after you're away? Maybe to be honest I've always taken advantage when you're around... with me... ): and im sorry... very ):

I find it stupid for us to breakup.We've been great since we were strangers, and definitely not throwing those memories down the drain.The time i asked for a breakup,i could feel the pain of someone trying to tear your veins apart from your heart.But what i could think of was whats best for you...you know sayang, my wish is to see you happy and not hurting yourself ever again.I think i did was right that is to let you find your happiness but whats wrong was me loosing something that i have been loving for a very long time.a very long time sayang!

This is for you to read and know that your presence has given the feeling that im secured with you,you're like a phone call away.When you're away,im not sure if i can hold myself back up.i miss you sayang, i missed you very much! i got sick thinking and worrying bout you there,but i should know that you're safe with your family and having fun.

You said at 8 on the day you left,i must stay near my phone and wait for your call to hear your voice that always makes me smile,i did, i waited till 4am but not a ring.i almost cried for waiting ...but i trust that any minute you'll call,but no...trust me i could just cry and felt very lonely.i went to sleep with full of sadness in my heart.The next day when i woke up,i tell myself it's okay,maybe you're tired and i shouldnt be disturbing you,so i told myself that you'll call .

Again at 8pm i waited by my phone and waiting for a ring from you.i was hoping that i'll not go to sleep with sadness again,one an half hour later......you called! i was happy! very excited!i spoke to you with full of tears,and my heart beating fast,but honestly , you sound normal....i don't hear your excited and sad voice....instead you were normal....i was thinking...didn't you missed me?? Did you really forget bout me??if you really did forget bout me , i don't blame you caused i told you so, but don't you missed me?? i missed you like goddamn much and i hear your voice normal.

You said you're excited and everything but you couldn't show it,i really turned off by you sounded like that,sorry but im being honest, continued...we can only chat for awhile due to the outgoing bills..and again i was sad,never thought after you calling me i can feel sad again.At least we chatted for a while.You did explained to me why you didn't call me last night,and so i was alright...alright?(:

im very sure you noticed the change of my voice when we were talking after i asked you why you sounded normal.Yup i told you not to promise me anything cause it'll give HEART ACHE!!I SWEAR I WAS EXPECTING YOUR CALL!!URGHH!! ): ):

We ended the call and then chatted with zufar and qilah on the phone as they wanted to conference.But i have to admit that its not the same talking on the phone with them compared to you sayang...): it's not...zufar and qilah did try to tell me things like you've got a family and stuff like that,but nothing changed my mind and feelings bout you ): Im just weak and sick for the pass three days thinking when can i talk on the phone and meet the person i love so much back.... ): every night...before i go to sleep.... i'll think of you and i....cry..... because you know that i feel like i've lost something very precious which i think cost more than my TV!

So...today is Friday...four more days to go...im counting down the days yes i do.........haaa...i just want you back shafiq sayang ): i just want my baby(you) back....i want you with me...you see this is just one week "." not yet your NS... But i think positive that...when you go NS every night you can call me,and as usual you can company me to sleep (; but what i hate most is ... i can't be with you!! im always in your arms shafiq! but when you're there..am i still in your arms?!! am i?! NO!! i know you don't want that but you have to...haaaaa....i don't know.....im.... dead without you sayang.... ):

Being patient and loving at the same time , can actually do you something good.

(A quote)PS:when i love someone, and im patient bout it..yes you shafiq you know it's you...and all my saved-up wishes will start coming out....

Shafiq sayang...lau ble, please jgn tinggalkan i lagi...i tknk sakit sebab i rindu u sgt..please..i sayang u sgt,i tknk u pergi...i nak u....i swear that's true.

a lonely girl awaits for her lover....

150610

2010-06-15T19:09:00.000-07:00

Holla! i really had a great time with my boyfriend,Shafiq(: yesterday. We spent time walking around,window shopping and then lunch and finally personal(:

Spending time with me was the only thing he ever wished for...so im also trying my best to give him my time,kinda sad that he's going for attachments,and away,but i believe he managed to hold on while i was gone for attachments for about 4 months,lucky that shafiq's attachment is only about 2 months or so...(:

I actually enjoyed myself,but still in head i just couldn't take the thinking off that he's off today.well,early in the morning today he called me and talked for a while before everything shuts down.well i cried to his last call and thats it , he's on plane and gone,haha you know that he's going only for 6 days? NYHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH,

i know its only a week and im being emotional, well what to do? i love him! of course w/o him as always, its gona make me feel damn awkward..girls, you know that feeling okay!....hmm right now, still trying to hold up, cause its not half a day yet, but this morning it rained heavily and i hope he's alright there,i wonder if he's soaking wet,oh dear, i really hope he's alright.):i'll be waiting for his call tonight.

well,yesterday we took alot of pictures and then we went for printing,fr the first of the time me and him at least printed out 8 pics of our own choice.pheww! i thought i felt never been better.(:

well im really missing him right now, just waiting for his text or call.alright then,i go now.. see ya bye!

Happy Birthday...

2010-05-24T05:19:00.000-07:00

First of all...Happy Birthday to me(:

tmr my birthday and hopefully its a good day and time....haha?

uhm, today is like not really a good day.. always there's something went wrong...ahh!! nvm..

kay lah bye!

fuck

2010-05-21T23:58:00.000-07:00

i hate it when somebody else get in the way, thanks to u!

just dont bother bout me!

go away!

don remember me!

i hate it!

fuck you!fuck you! fuck you!arhhh!!!!

get lost!

realizing;

2010-05-15T02:17:00.000-07:00

Just let her go! don't waste your bloody time and move on, cause you're going to get nothing!

forget it will you! its dammn irritating when you start to repeat it! damn!

stop it, i said.....go away!

Birthday, here i come! :)

friends, im sorry :(

i want to meet you soon!! :s

i want us to be like last time... :( :)

that's all...BYE!

Out of hand !

2010-05-11T23:43:00.000-07:00

I guess things are simply getting out of hands. Sometimes , certain things that can be settled properly and not a big problem,people will exagerate. Thats what making me get so irritated.

Yes i know you have difficulty most of the times,but just a favour,a small favour..you start to temperamental.that shouldnt be the way , you should react.

you can talk politely and firm,but not by shouting cause that's what making others fed-up.Certain things you are strict at but that does not mean all the time...

All this can stop,but try to belive that it will..will STOP!Everybody lie,it's natural,even if im considered as a liar,i guess no point if i tell you what happen right..? so be it...

As for you people *******, enough of pasturing me, enough of contacting me,cause that will destroy my lovely relationship,it's been good until you guys came..it's hard to forget but possible to forgive.im not assuring of or sure of what's gona happen next,but please..i think enough is enough.thank you.k..cut it! hah!

now in school,waiting,shafiq,yeah.basically everything is going good,i just thought that everything's gona be okay.Well some are already fine. But what hurts the most is that if someone you trust just keep saying you're a liar...? does that hurt you?... im very sure it does.. okay that i''ll just have to keep it inside not revealing it.sometimes i feel that having lots of friends just can be a bother to others.that really hurts.

CUT IT :s

OMG! YOU WANT KNOW THAT MY EYES SWELL?!!! like literally swell!! aiyoyoyothambi...i had to walk around with a small eye a side . But it's okay..rather than i have to use an eye-patch like a pirate?? ITS OKAY YAH!like seriously shafiq is so lambat sehhhh......smpi aku nk tertido dibuatnye...lucky i have Q with me as she cancelled of going to PS,no time baby...got training.. PT, very good Q. heh :P

hmm.. kay lah...i think i've write down and let out what i wanted to.. so maybe now instead of controlling the pain of falling asleep...i'll go do something together with Q..take care babloooos!! bye!!

shafiq:you should know that what ever pun..i have never pushed you aside right?....so i hope you'll trust me again... and not of the negative side..let's go forward.. (:

what a wait..

2010-05-05T21:02:00.000-07:00

kay,first of all . im in school library ... bored as usual ...
not much to saybut at least something...

after three dyas of waiting and full of misses and worries,finally yesterday situation went back to normal..

M called!!

k bye!

hmmm...

2010-04-29T01:04:00.000-07:00

Im in school now, having PM2 lesson, very bored , i guess our project is done.So i'll blog uh.Nowadays sometimes things,can be difficult,especiallywhen im about to get over it, but it comes back.Basically,now im making friend with someone i know but just couldn't have the chance to talk.Andnow, everybody is apart.

Hahaha,Q,don't worry.i get his call.i had a dream and never it'll come true ,i picked up his call and get his bill flying high.Right now,idon'tknow wether im thinking straight or not,cause this new friend of mine is making things hard.k what ever, cut it!

oh! oh! i can't wait to meet 25 may 2010.it's going to be the maybe exciting?maybe.heard thati'll great the biggest gift from my abg, and everybody's wowing at me,but i don't confirm it's going to happen,because it is ridiculous of him to give me that,don'thave to mention what.hmm..

sorry,im really bored,verybored,justdon't know what to say..okay,gtg now bye.loves!

start of school...

2010-04-16T21:17:00.000-07:00

Back to school.IA ended.Presentation have to be done.Glad that having another project for PM2.I'll manage it.Friends are much more matured i guess."new classmate" *help me*

hmm, miss Just buns,like my second family is there,thought of part-timing there, well i also thought of spending my time enough with s,since i've been neglecting him during my IA days.but i need to earn my own allowance.missed just buns,313 somerset,my friends there.

Someone "i know" just wont stop irritating me.like as if i've owe her something.But it's okay i hope she know her limits, and go beyond the line, but whats most irritating is when my classmates start to say, "afiqah! , where's your bestfriend?" walao stoop it say you guys!!f'ked up sia!!

nadai ngawak dek pilih sama dia,aneng ngigak aku adek selama-lamanye,aku sayau dek kapunyiak.

i dont know why im just having so many feelings in me and end up im frustrated myself...sometimes im behaving cold towards my own friends and special one ...im sorry guys what's bad is pms you know, i truly hate that, havent been having that, i dont know why it comes today...but ill try to control...as for you, glad that you have what you want, and take care of it aye..i love you s...

IM DONE :)

funny

2010-04-01T23:25:00.000-07:00

Hello...im finally back to blog.been busy with attachment and some unreasonable people,Q i clearly understand what you trying to say girl!!haha funny lah u, after you quit, dont forget me girl :( i'll miss you...

ive got nothing much to say ah.. sorry ah.. many to recall.. nvm ah, if i have the time,i'll update ah kay?

chiaos.. nk EAT !!i'LL MISS JUST BUNS AND CHEWY JUNIOR!!

HAPPY BIRTHDAY SHAFIQ!!ohh one more thing....
aneng ngigak aku adek selama-lamanye agek tau!!

0omeegee...

2009-12-27T03:17:00.000-08:00

ok ok , i know.. its already..27 december and thats very long.. but trust me internet has been a bitch, and only now i can update,thats because im at my cousin place and this because his net is purfect! thanks cousin! :D ohh i've got lots of things to update just that i must recall everything..

kk, first of all on the 10 dec, had IA meeting that is Industrial Attachment meeting okay?kayy..

19 dec, a day before my brother's birthday, we went out to vivo citay and catched a movie that is AVATAR and then shopped around and then we had a explosive dinner,what i meant was, we had lots of food for dinner.satay,dishes and etc. actually after that we're supposed to go for cycling and then cancelled cause we reached the east coast park at about 9+.

20 dec, mum bought cake,afiq cut , ate it,full, sleep *wasn't a gd celebration tho*

24 dec, we catched another movie with, my auntie my cousin ,the birthday boy and hazirah , afiq an seri.we watch Alvin and the chipmunks 2!! trust me they're cute and funny,and also.. SAD! certain part about alvin,hell yeah..walked home to my cousin place and then cycled..

25 dec, we came over as there was no one at home and overnight-ed here,till today 27 dec 2009.it was fun, had movie over the net chatted with friends ordered foods,fast food,slept at 3 in the morning.yea, we woke up and went for breakfast outside. But the most troulesome thing is in the morning at about 3+ the two afiq's asked me to cooked for them maggi mee,as they were hungry..but too bad i ignored and sleep.HAHAHA!! so today,is the final day here,me and borther are going home, but guess what my cousin block is just two to three blocks away from my block.can posibly have a less than 5 minutes walk.

more to come,but sorry i've forgottn lots of things, couldnt recal and dont know how to write.

thats all folks! take care,LOVE YOUU!!

I missed him, but he's not there for me, always busy,please don't ignore or avoid me,cause im feeling lonely and im needing you.i missed you alot and loved you so much, please come back and to our normal activity.i wonder if you missed me, cause i am til im sick. please make time for me, i hope you understand my feelings.i undestand you're busy, but just little time ....for...me...I LOVE YOUU BESTFRIEND.shafiq.....

friday...

2009-11-06T04:38:00.000-08:00

Today,had fun with my buddy...S. We had enjoy walking around the whole tampines.Tampines 1 ,Century Square, Tampines Mall. We went round the whole tampines just to find the Xcraft shop to buy some accessories.Im glad S got his stuff.Like his bracelet and anklets.Trust me i feel paiseh, why...? its because of S buying for me my hp screen protector, after that i kept quiet.btw,THANK YOU S!!

only went once,but not other three sessions,because,it's boring and doesn't help me.i know when to stop okay!. one fine day...haha so what else ignore uh...malas nk layan.

reached home at about 6.45pm . After5 minutes reached home. mum called !! , asking where am i,and she's already reaching home..... do you guys know what i felt at that point of time...?!! my heart pumped very damn fast okay !! ohh1 and after knowing my parents are otw back, i quickly get the dinner served on the table, so that once my parents step into the house i can just get rice ready and what else EAT !!! its because im hungry!! haha ate alot though....nows stomach's full.

haha after quite sometime blogging and now also talking to S on the phone.haha i really thanked S for buying things that i can buy myself.THANKS S!!again Thanks S! last but not least,S, on thursday,we've got to hang out okay? have fun!

kk nothing else..take care bye!

when the day comes

2009-10-30T23:45:00.000-07:00

HEY,okay okay! im updating now! relax lah!
Im still wondering it's been three im having pimples and not gone yet,but today's better,so much more better.k cut it!

Friday couldn't make it to smoking campaign as something happen,need not elaborate.Also friday didn't played for the soccer game,as players couldn't make a proper decision. End up Mr Ng cancelled our team out.VERY SAD!!

Had lots of fun tho,but going home part just make me think hard just to find reason so that i won't get into trouble again and get S scolded or troubled too.Hmm by luck,it wasn't that bad,S told me so, i believed him and everything went well...? i guess so..nahh...

OHH!!something,im very excited about the surprise im getting from S.maybe this tuesday? i hope so..speaking bout this tuesday,i cant find my colour papers,i bought it siak! is either i misplace them is with my buddy or is in my locker in school,better in either one,if not,i can't loose them,i buy it.. and there's still alot not use sia!with that colour papers i can only complete my very own something i've made for S. I HOPE EVERYTHING WILL GO WELL...

Since my line now can't or maybe not activated,i can't use the phone.gosh,gotta bare with it, but im use to it before.APOLOGISE FRIENDS AND S!!i'll try to topup my other card and contact you people back asap okay.

for S; I MISS YOU! :(

2009-10-15T05:26:00.001-07:00

hmm.. let me see,today had FHS testtook my test very late,my schedule was supposed to be 3.30 but postponed o 4.30 because of the training i've got to go.But still halfway i went off,didnt get to present what me and my new group of friends had done.

oi made lots of friends there,lucky that i went,i just love upgrading myself.well,miss having fun with them,sad that i had to go off early.hmm my new frieds are; theresa,nafisah,atiqah,wan,ridhwan,lawrence,zaini,jackey*if i spell that right*para,*if i spell right too* and the other two, i forget,hmm cool you know!

finally headed for test,after test met miss loh,gosh.. leceh know! S already waiting for me,had to rush out, i guess i made im wait again...yup..busd home...lepak jap ngn S. yup than alik.. lk beg terus mkn! sbb dah lapar...mkn uh.... now blogging and chatting ,kay lah nthn else update more soon...

i discover one thing bout me,i love upgrading myself.hee:B

take care

hmmppfft

2009-10-10T20:20:00.000-07:00

hey ! yesterday went to lina's open house,it was fun..even if we didnt really talked much,went there with S .

i love the time we were otw there, the atmosphere was VERY VERY different.

left choa chu kang at about 6 p..planned to go to faez house but couldnt make it..also hamida's place.but its okay there's a next time.

i did a mistake but he just wanted to hide it from me, but i know it that i made a mistake so i apologize.

finally took a bus home,headed back to 7-11 , had to buy something, and go home,reached home.have some snack and chatted with mum, and finally sleep.

thats all,just frustrated couldnt log in to msn....URGH!
byes ;S

hmmppfft

2009-10-08T02:11:00.000-07:00

hey,today was boring,my grandparents are here,i was very tired that yesterday reached home at about 10.30pm ,what else? jln raya lah,but with grandparents,my parents are working.

hmm..i should say ever since this holiday started or whenever holidays begin,i'll be busy otp with my buddy.Well at least i've got company.yup...

today,just went out of the house to buy lunch and met buddy.Sad that its only for a short while.but still i have that feeling back ,duh!thanks buddy! smoked, cool huh?! heh :D

I cant wait for monday as i get to go back to school! i know its weird that people will want holiday and not school,well... i'd prefer school,i've got friends and teachers and at least not bored at home,ALONE!

Well glad that your hand is recovering soon baby,and i pray hard that everything will go back to normal aite?:D just be patient , everythings alright.hm so far you've seen my expression all this while.Well i can't wait o be in school to meet you ,so let's look forward aite...hahaha i miss you so...!!

toodles,im off..byes...take care i miss you buddy ;D

after a long time...

2009-10-05T20:13:00.000-07:00

you see,been boring even though its raya,i havent gone out with friends or go out with family..as parents working and sibling schooling.

I actually just came back yesterday from granny place,overnight there for about four days, and it been such a boredom,but my bestfriend accompanied me to sleep.thanks buddy!!! My parents,auntie and granny went to Malaysia KL for my cousin's wedding,she looked pretty trust me ! like a doll :) mum showed me her picture, i wish her best of luck in her new life :B

At granny's place me with brother and my cousin,hazirah.We've rather enjoyed eating fastfood almost every day's we stayed there.and granny too ;) cool uh my granny:) haha!

Right, here ; after two weeks i've met my bstfriend,i met him before i leave bedok, buddy came over, i was so excited but acted kaku had no idea why, we enjoyed the 'kentut' smell and also we chatted along the way back to my granny's place,hey! bad joke of getting lost okay! hmm this week is finally the last week of school holiday, i want to go back to school and have all the activities back. :S I REALLY DO MISS YOU! EACH AND EVERY DAY,YOU'RE GETTING CUTTER!! i love it :D

i've missed you ,lucky that day we get to still meet,hey!eventhough you are in that situation,i won't eave you.i'll still be by your side and stay with you,i dont care what other people say,but you're important to me,its okay if it concerns my sleep or anything,what i know that you're alright.Just know that ive been looking forward to have your daily routine back,make sure we get it back once school reopen aite:D i've missed you so much,and i'll always love you.I love you shafiq :D

what eh..?

2009-09-25T06:53:00.000-07:00

hmm.. it's been 6 days of raya..and i havent go out much..visiting my relatives.hmm that's because my parent started working and brothers schooling.

Ohh ohh! one thng im happy but alright bout it is.. i got my new handphone back !!! cool or what?!!
Marlyana kita kai handphone same model uh!!...hee. suke seh aku, dpt hp alik...oh ya... my best buddy Q,returned from johor,visiting her granny for raya! i miss you girl! :S and my lovely bestfriend,hamida also finally talk to me! heeepikaiyuu.!!! suke aku..

ohh, today something happened,something irritating, as it is always the case,i will just wait and see,maybe i don't confront her,but ill wait for the worst..i thought you'll stop your bad attitude,but somehow,you just have to do the same to my own lovely buddy.i knew it was you, as that 'feeling' grew inside.haha! we'll watch and wait.i know everything,but i'll not take actions first.

to you,my buddy; im missing you already,but i just cant meet you yet.i want to meet yo quick so i can hug you and tell you i love you.wishing to see ou in baju kurung,and keep a picture of it.hee.but from far,do keep yourself away from trouble and take care of yourself aite :B i love you :B

kk im off.. see ya..

HARI RAYA!

2009-09-18T23:10:00.001-07:00

GEESH! tmr raya! shiok ape?! haha well everything is ot really fully complete still needs to be cleared somewhere in the house.ohh kk, im sorry...

SELAMAT HARI RAYA MAAF ZAHIR DAN BATIN MUSLIMS FRIENDS!!

Hmm..its okay to not have a new pair of clothes,still have my last two years..Hijau pucuk pisang the colour..whats yours?

kuih sume dah settle dah..cume umah je...Well honestly not that exiting but still alright.hhaha,to my friends: sape yg tk puasa tkle raya tauu!! haha!!

been bored at home doing the same things,i meant cleaning.i need to go out,ohh yahh!! i nk uat innai,tk uat uat dari hari tu! ape seh!!

today woke up at 8.30,early right? just to clean the house.well afterall i'll get the credit too,haha!..

kay lah im off just bored and nothing to do :B take care peeps! enjoy!

hmms

2009-09-15T23:07:00.000-07:00

Hello!! been busy with raya preparations.But also can be tiringg and annoying you know.Still havent got my clothes,but it's okay.Yesterday 140909 was very tiring,met up with mum and auntie and went to geylang and and with my uniform, can you imagine how much can i sweat,it's already hot there and with my school uniform and ,idk,just very humid.Reached home at about 11.45.Talked on phone till about 12.30 and finally went to bed.

okay..now just in the library,right now just feeling so damn bored,and fucked up,just dont feel like talking to do anything.,i can't believe im tearing in my school library.omg.. suck up sia.

Im suppose to meet S , then mum ask me to meet her at 4.45,im alreadynot sure what time will S finish or reach school.I bet mum will make more noise if i were to be late meeting her again.idk lah..ape nak jadi ,jadi lah..then S ask me to go home,im already in school.WTF SIA! idk lah everything just cock up just like that .Im so irritated,very annoyed.argh ! WTH!

i still gotta to send my classmate our group project ,and i got alot to do sia.nvm,im out of words.bye

should it be this way...?

2009-09-06T01:30:00.000-07:00

i know I've not been updating regularly.

had no idea why...just couldn't find the answer why I'm like this...
is it because of what happen?my feelings change?paranoid?help ...
ever since,I'm just not me..maybe there's something bothering me but i cant figure that out..
something really makes me feel confuse...
Can i share? i cant...
just couldn't spit it out...
not been good recently..or from the very beginning of fasting month..been crazy...
i hope everything is going to be alright..?
thanks alot to you... :(

im sorry i missed yo badly...
im sorry i loved you badly...
im sorry i did things to you...
im sorry i thought of you always..
but i just want to have you with me all the time..now thats wrong

cut the crap ! i can't take it any longer!

i admit i do things wrongly at times,but this time is just not right...

can anyone help me?just anyone..?i feel so down today..had no idea why..but i don't feel like talking or anything else.it's time for a change...

heepeekaiyuuu ~

2009-08-30T19:03:00.000-07:00

GEYLANG !!!

I NAK I NAK !!

2009-08-27T05:04:00.000-07:00

let me see ...hmm...today's practical was alright,did experiment with chun mei my classmate.Never i payed attention in class and know how to do experiments,but today i managed to.Btw today's experiment was actually with milk,okay the smell was...killing me.trust me.After the whole experiment was over did some debrief and after that Miss tan continued giving the answer for yesterday's pest control talk,tell you,i was already confused and the answer were damn freaking long and we had to write? yea we had to write..! i was cold having my lab coat don still and hands were just frozen to write,but whoaa.it was more like a composition siaaa...

Found out monday is going to be half day.Tuesday holiday!! COOL OR WHAT? gerek oik !!but im looking forward for thursday...hmm may not be as open but still gona have fun! we shall !! 3rd 3rd 3rd 3rd !!! that number shall be remembered forever!!

hmm its already.20.05 haha breakfast already ,duh ! stomachs full tho,before i eat a proper food i just munched pastries. i was kinda full and when parents came home mum bought a burger for me..AWESOME! ddah lama tk mkn burger..?.. kk cut the crap.

besok bwk balik cupboard besarrr nyeee,ape lagi project punye pasal uhss..PM1.

m feeling alil better,maybe i thought i've shared things with shafiq?hmm but i still need time to get myself back..had no idea why but just not in the mood.friends cheered me up , but thats for a while,the pain inside is still there.unless its healed as time goes by.but anyways ,thanks to shafiq my buddy for cheering me up and tolerating my attitude after all this while,i hope you understand and help me through.also special thanks to my best buddy,aqilah (:will you help me still? i want you with me :(

pain

2009-08-26T06:04:00.000-07:00

PAIN

that's the only thing i feel and i can say.

something different

2009-08-24T05:27:00.001-07:00

hmm.reached ome,kinda early,at about 6.30? well was fine.. lepak-ed with shafiq for awhile..today..had no idea why my mood just went slanted..not sure moody or angry or what.

reached home, parents not home, brother said they went to buy food for breakfast,i thought okay. i just get ready the drinks.My parents reached home not that late and brought something i havent eat for long time.. Delifrance !! ape lagi, everybody ate it silently,as duh..!! enjoying the food lahh...had milo for drink , wah heavy huh..?

hmm three days of fasting past.im sure this is going to be a fast month?Just now just had a slow talk with shafiq as to release my irritated feeling inside.. i had no idea thi is happening to me for the past few days..nvm just control myself. dalam bulan puasa mesti banyak brsabar fiqa...=.="

hmm now just chatting and i think im out of words,want to chat ...bye!

Maybe i Shouldn't

2009-08-23T18:48:00.000-07:00

I don't why but it's just me...since it's the beginning of fasting month,my mind is always looking back at the past.It makes me feel scared and hating them.I wondered why did i even do those things that can really upset my parents when,i knew that will upset them.Is this a sign that fasting month is the month when i can realize every single bit of my mistake and make sure i don't do it again.Felt this is the time to start a fresh.But wondering how am i suppose to kneel down to my parents and seek forgivness?Im gona be damn shit embarassed..

that biggest mistake of mine , will never get out of my head and will always make me think before doing anyone stupid.i know,why only this time, a mistake i do will really sink into my head? i admit ,yes...well ,thats why from now on,i just keep it to myself and never tell it to anyone or i breakdown and cry.

kk. thats it for that topic..right now just in sch during my break time,doing nothing,in the library.Me with marlyana and aqilah.hmm,but they're off to somewhere else.kk.. ive got nothing else to say...seems like im not in a good area?...you know what i mean?...

take care bye!

Fasting month !

2009-08-22T02:47:00.000-07:00

HELLO!! hmm been bored at times at home.But had fun time with my cousins.Went here and there , like kecohh!! haha!!

btw..
SELAMAT MENUNAIKAN IBADAH PUASA MUSLIM FRIENDS!!

another thing, thanks buddy.Ill pay you up soon.you've been helping eversince.

For some few days back i had no idea why im just not myself, in the mood of madness.Just one mistake thats it.Kinda moody as well..For friday ate too much just because the next day had to fast, thats was stupid but worth it,im not hungry now ,just waiting for dusk to breakfast.So today's the first day of fasting month.Not sure bout this but friends are simply talking bout raya's clothes , wth havent even reach a day of puasa but raya dah bbl dulu.nvm common! heh..

hmm things will change right? hopefully.been better but certain things is just the same,irritating attitudes . Im just holding on to the people but not sure till when.hmm thanks to my buddy for advising me.

Today woke up at 2.15? hehe :P sorry uh.. tired sia...hmm righ now just chatting wih my buddy and lsitening to music andand blogging , hahaha.friends been telling my to update ,like dead blog, okay here i am.

hmm seems like ive got nothing else to say.. till here..take care friends ! :)

uhmm

2009-08-09T06:19:00.000-07:00

Hey! haha watched National Day parade live on tvo..nyeh! =.=' it was alright,couldnt see my cousin involved in the parade . but its okay..

watched singapore idol too,haha some of the contestant were simply jokers. But some are really talented,if im not mistaken .. its a girl....haha she's just talented.

Waiting for tuesday to come still.Sha texted me ,aww boy, can't stand not having fun together.Tuesday yah !! :] .....

simple bored now.hmm textinng buddy [: hmm bored uh bye!

eeyahh

2009-08-08T05:17:00.000-07:00

hey's,for first time came back early..yesterday...everything's okay...

At night went out with family for dinner, naice siaa...KFC been long i ate that...i ate alot trust me...

no school till Tuesday,boring !..A pair of new eyes too ! with him :]

been bored at home,want to topup soon..or get that980 back ! :S , strawberry too next week.

arh ! test on the 13 aug,14 aug, apadaaa..nvm just study then.

charging mp4,hopefully it can work,haiyo..

im hungry,very hungry,my mind eversince was only FOOD !

K off to watch Big momma's house; old movie yet funn.. hehe :]

I LOVE YOU[:

heyy !

2009-08-07T01:51:00.000-07:00

hmm..finally ; i've got my contacts, one for shafiq too :] Tuesday gona wear,i've worn before but..it's been long..that someone was excited earlier and end up silent of joy.next stop,ring!

Monday is a holiday ; National Day , HAPPY 44TH NATIONAL DAY SINGAPORE !! :)

Been sick for about three days? yesterday thursday, was the worst my temp went up so high that i can't control. im having a bad aching on body and sore throat that needs to be cleared off slowly.whats worst..? fever that doesnt gets better ! :S

earlier was about to had practical for FHP, miss loh asked to check temp as every mondays & friday's have to take temp..my temp was 37.88 at first,37.81,37.4(didnt take it properly) nyahahaha.

overall today was alright..

do take care of your 'eyes' and if you need anything just spit it out to me..im doing all this sincerely and not asking anything in return...thanks for being there when im sick and i really hope you should not wory to much aye ? :] just now that im always waiting for your presence...

why ?

2009-08-02T00:06:00.000-07:00

just got to use the com,after me needed to quarrel.Been bored staying at home.i want to go out,btw at home not like i have activities to do.The computer? hah! i may need to drag those using and finally my turn.

yesterday's was shaheed's pit or chalet,not sure...sorry shaheed ! i couldn't go,as i can't go out of this freaking house even !...btw still HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO YOU!*it's on friday actually* May all your wishes come true,and be succesful person.Don't create trouble and make sure you know what you're going and leading.Loves!

yay me ! tmr going school...i know.. i know.. going school?wth?1 right...but to me school's fun . And nthn can be better to go school if you're in my shoes.

Tmr, is gona be a great day for me?...yeah! it'll be great! exciting! celebrating ..but sad couldnt get the gift's on time..but it's okay in the morning....we'll hve fun aye?:D HOMA !!

Trust me i want to go school alright.bored at home ! grr...super bored..rot enough..not like i have entertainment.

I WANT HIM BY MY SIDE,MISSING YOU ALREADY !! :(

fuckedup day

2009-07-31T21:37:00.000-07:00

today brother's being a pussy and a fucked up person doesnt know he is a fucked bullshit. too many to describe ! so one thing for him...

FCUK YOU DAWG!

FUCKEDUP !

2009-07-31T03:16:00.000-07:00

ya thanks alot! if you wanted to use it,im always giving you on the spot,but you..? what about fcking you? did you do the same? fked up no ! i know it's different now then last time,but you can at least fking respect right? dawg! I don't understand what a fkedup life i've got after i admit a mistake i've done,but the least you people can do is to respect,i still respect you as a fked up person ,but i just don't think you even do the same to me.so what if you have the materials that actually at young aged student shouldn't need it! i dont fking care ok?! as long as i've got smthn with me thats fine..not like you..yes i know i show bad example at times but that doesnt mean you don't have to do this fking attitude to me right?! what a dawg you can be sial,HAHA! never know that such a person can still be around me.

I should just say some,and not in details : environment just never the same,as always.more attitudes and things that i should be more patient with.Don't talk to me bout trust,i hate that topic!Lost everything.nonsensically , the house key? hah! dawg! things in school,wtf? must update everything should they? anjing!ahh!!just any other problems you can think of ...

today..had fun with my buddy. hang-ed out for awhile and finally bused home,thanks Buddy ! appreciates lots,and hey! im really sorry bout not getting the lord of the ring this coming monday,just that my eyes begin to hurt for days...hmm.but i hope you'll take care of it, and really,enjoy wearing it,remember terms and conditions applied..HAHAH!! btw today's prac was alright..had to present in front of the class,and duh? i had to speak,lina hold the paper but it all cool,heh :D ohh ya! on the 4 ,13,18 august i got test mayne! 4 aug and 18 aug are FHP tests, and 13 aug is my FHS test,hopefully i'll remember what i've learnt. nvm FIQA CAN DO IT! HEH :P i ponder for laksa sioll!!! bile lah aku nk mkn laksa...sape sape ble masak kan? ble? :P another ponder is....SKL STRAWBERRY!! hmm right now just chatting with my buddy and thinking of what to do next. k lah..

taking care folks! ybbud.u.evol.i

Wishing to have my w980i back.....hurhur :(

the day is here....

2009-07-26T19:17:00.000-07:00

hey ! :D im finally back in school! yay! okay lame...=.=' haha,bad of me to not attend my lecture,heh...thanks to aqilah for helping me get my notes,thanks Aqilah ! :D

Right now im having break before the next lesson start at 11.30.

Yesterday i was told that dad wanted to have a talk with me,feeling scared i just did my own housechores and act as per normal.Didnt really talked to him,but im still trying to relax,wishing i must not be 'suspended' from school.oh! at home....i've been eating delicious meals at home,especially my mum's fried chicken heh ! my favourite you know, nothing can beat my mum's chicken okay !!haha kk back to what i say...

Going to the month of August, waiting for the day, 3August2009. Im sure im gona enjoy that wonderful day of mine.Let's be happy aye:D. Oh, not forgetting august is also the month which im going to enjoy most....FASTING! yay! and next HARI RAYA!! woohoo!! sure can slim want...but after dawn ima eat as much..hahaha....im sure fasting month will be a great month for me,it's like after a long time.Try uh puasa sebulan.xD

- Im just excited to see him in contact lens, sure he's gona look damn cute...^^ we wear grey together! hee...oh also rings! blackie..!!! hey! to you..im doing all this sincerely,not asking anything in return so don't feel obligated aye? It should be me returning you your deeds and never think that you're using my money aye? love ya loads!!

haishhh

2009-07-26T05:06:00.000-07:00

Well, today just stayed at home,not much of activity, just watched HP and the half blood prince,parents bought the DVD.

My prepaid low...again! what siaa...all low, even batt.. cool right?...watever .

I want to go back to school ! I know to you guys out there,school's boring,but to me school is much fun than staying at home having to do nothing.

Alil misunderstanding with a friend of mine,but we're back in good terms. Just freaked out,but it was alright..explained and settled.. :]

These few days,yes i did think through bout things just won't stop playing in mind. I thought i've ought to change myself,but im not changing because of other course...but certain things im also still confused about . I don't want to loose anything anymore.It's hard for me ,guess.Ill do it slowly and change.more me.

ps: to you,im so sorry,should've explain clearly.Im sorry i've hurt you.but please don't get angry like that again, you scared me and i wouldn't be thinking straight.Im missing you already and i have to speak to you.see you tmr and i would love to hug you tight! :]

fun fun fun

2009-07-20T06:27:00.000-07:00

today,i had fun with him! i finished school at about 5.30? or 5? he waited for me and went back home together..yeepee!! school's alright.Had theory all the way..sucks!..PM lesson was alright but still kecoh tho ; hahaha ... ive got nothing much to say actually but just fun i have...hahaha.i'll update more if i have more to say okay? haha take care peeps!

I HAD SO MUCH FUN TODAYY!!

boredom...

2009-07-18T05:25:00.000-07:00

K how should i start... ohh ! a week past,so far so good, keep it up fiqa ! stayed at home he whole day today, didnt go out,parents working.Still adjusting myself with the 'atmosphere', hah!

Today's special movie what? Harry Potter blah blah.. boringg!! k nvm. Im so bored at home.i want to go out siaaa....i want lappy !!

I know it's only Saturday, but i miss you boy!! We had fun yesterday, laughter filled the air.. chey! mcm P. Schools timetable changed and i end much more later than before, so got to bare with the practical and theory dragging for hours.hmm pity him that ,he have to go school everyday at 8 am.but it's okay you'll get use to it.

im in need of new songs.all my new songs are in my new phone but it's confiscated, grr... so i eed it in my com so that i can put it in my mp3 or mp4, maybe both lah kay..songs!

akuuuuuuuuu sayaaaaaaaaaaaannnnnnnnnngg kauuuuuuuuuuuuuu !!

not to be repeated...

2009-07-17T04:03:00.000-07:00

HEY ! sorry for not updating !! Didnt have the internet and finally got back, but only now im using the com, been busy or should i say couldn't use the com for some time..

Let me just write what i've missed.Couldnt go school for a week after school reopen.due to some reason which ill never forget and never to be repeated! never! Now back to school, so far so good but still adjusting myself with the situation..but it's alright,just have to obey..

Missed my friends and teachers and some 'places-of-interest' in school. Everything's change,much more serious i should say.All i have to do now is study and just go through the important time to come.I've stopped some things, shouldnt mention.People will realise themselves.

To you, it's been a great time, hope this will carry on,but at the same time, some things i have to not do, hope you'll understand,and just bare with me, but i'll try my best to get back like usually we are.Hpe to go far,but ohwell....thanks for verything you've done for me.been great having time together with you.sorry if i've changed,but i guess it's for the better? but never my attitude change okay? Just know that, i'll inform you if there's anything,and never leave you aside.

FINALLY IM WEARING MY VANS SHOE?!!HAH!

what a begginning of the month...^^

2009-05-19T03:06:00.000-07:00

omgosh !! im so sorry for not updating ya'll..i've been waiting for my internet to come back after running away from home after a few month,haish it has got a big scolding from parents that why.hee!!

gee~ first of all lucky that i've done all my test's 0.- gosh! you know whats the meaning of "terkial-kial"? hee i was terkial-kial uhs...belajar ni sume heh, step mana nye belajar je ehk.i've also been trying to clear things off my mind,trying to have some peace and also heaven? who want to go to hell right?? AIYO !!

Congrats to my dearest girlfriend Hamida upon her wish.MUDST LISTEN TO ME ALRIGHT!! SHAFIQ TOO!! haha joking je lah.for me just wan to have a great day on my birthday tu je.

i say ! exams are just around the corner lah sehh...walao not prepared lah sia.nvm just try my best je lah ~.~

i think i may have to uodate always , this is because im at my twin sister place that i can use her lappy (: if not at ome im like so boring with the com not working.THANKS HAMIDA ~! tmr got school...dreadful huh?....soccer...lazy huh?....BUT!! i go school for some reason okay...!! you want to know what?....... Ït's for me to know and for you to in out" haha i got swimming lesson,sungguh tk menarik....blurgh!!! apedaa...

eh i think ahh i think ahh i think ahh... i have fallen for something.. not person know..... something...=.='HUAHUAHUAHAHUAHUAHUAHUA!!NOT PERSON OKAY. dont think ive fallen for a person, actually since last time dahh...i've fallen for.. VAN'S !!! nice bodoh !! must see !! remebered that hamida and fad my two soccer teammates were dragging me to tampines mall for this research that they hav to write a report on.very well , i followed them and helped out with their research...jengjengjeng...than at the same time i also ape lagi.. mata rolling uh... heee~VAN'S!!! aku nmpk, poooh!! sampai senget you know i fall....but then it was alright.

k lah tu je,ceh ! ending tk betul ! tkpe dh penat maklumlah adi siang bekerje kn.... nk rehat dikatakan...k lah kirimm salam saudara mara sume kay..

take care loves,bye
AFI-KAYAA 822**

yes ahh

2009-04-12T06:11:00.000-07:00

TMR SCHOOL !!

YAYY!!

MISS CALL ME TWEETY !!

oh yeahh

2009-04-10T03:18:00.000-07:00

Monday get back to school...yay ! im happy that i will have my activities back,bored at home,doing nothing.Even if in school is busy,i enjoy them.Fizah will coming to my school too,double the yayness...yay!!

Changing of hairstyle,everybody asked me,hmm..not sure..but i may need to have my hair grow first =.=' i want new shoes like, VANS, i saw on of them ,oohooo! damn nice, i want it.buy me one and i'll love you !i don't have the pic but somehow i ave it in my mind!Ned to buy my new contact lens,expired blurgh! 0.-'

meet my friends..yay!!my classmate's.My bestfriends too!! Tammie and idra,impossible for idra as she's gone for attachments.you know nursing, hmm ppfft.TAMMIE YES ?we must hang out real soon,very soon , like yah !

yesterday watched a thailand horror movie with mum,haha screams from mum,makes me wanna watch more.hehe :P. It's all about twins,that they're live and die together, and somehow more like a revenge and it is about love,both loving to one guy but the guy prefer the other one w/o specs.what's wrong with girls on specs.they story flashback what happened that when i only understand whats it all about,heh i watch but don't understand? pathetic siaaa.

chatted with him on phone but end up line cut off,due to poor reception.nvm i'll just have to wait till today or monday,miss all my lovelies!!i want to hug them.LOVES :D

BUYEEEE!!!

damn..

2009-04-08T17:37:00.000-07:00

Alright,what happen recently...nothing much,just online and chat here and there.Hang out with buddies but for a while.been bored at home,very.I've always wanted to see how he'll look like in the vans shoe's i've present him on his birthday last thursday 2 April.Went out with my cousin and him yesterday,was great .He look awesome and totally fine.i though i'll be staring at him but end up something he did that just stopped me.

Well.somehow.sometimes people do make mistakes.But this is way to far.I really,didn't expect the worst.But it's okay people do find thousands of ways to avoid from being it leak out.I've forgiven but may not forget bout it.Trying my best to let go.And now my own bestfriend not sure if he can even face me?Please , don't have to.just be normal and not like im going to do anything.I was not shock yet very dissapointed.im back to normal but still need time.Just know that if this were to happen again, i may not even forgive you and regardless you're someone close to me or long time we've known each other or what ever it is.if it's enough means enough.Thank You.

And as for you my dearest bestfriend,i really appreciate what you've done for me,but somehow i expect you to just tell me the truth.It's okay, it's not your fault, you were told to do it and you have no choice but too help me.i understand your reason that you're busy but let's not act different okay?Please act normal,i want the old you back :(

horrible =.=

2009-03-30T04:15:00.000-07:00

first of all got scolding from my brother and my hp is being slammed and...deng ! is all spoiled, i need a new phone...totally!!i got so angry,ignored you ! kay nvm...

right now just have to cool down for a moment, and then have fun again. osh my dada is so irritating, can't they ever stop nagging at me !

i want to start school back.kk im so bored couldnt get a job. slacking at home is fun yet boring you know.k i dont know what im talking bout.

I WANT A NEW PHONE !!

chiow

This is getting serious...

2009-03-17T05:15:00.000-07:00

well,again soccer cancelled, and just tmr the tournament if,confirmed.hmm.. i've been so bored and soccer always in mind.hm but ti's okay on thursday gona play soccer with my two brothers..

urgh! as i said gona have test on thursday and friday..sianzzz. it's okay i'll get this done and overwith and sadly this won't stop cause this are my considered GPA for the term.had test jsut now huh bro?GD LUCK!

Can't wait for my class pit on the 27 &&28 of march cause im gona be out till late night, planned to go shisha with my two galfriends,hamidah and filzah and maybe shah:D confirm gerek oi !

ps: to that particular girl aite.. just don't be too desperate and jeallous over small stuff.cause with those kinds of feeling won't change his heart of any.you're simply a attention seeker that everybody knows.just be yourself and don't come to school with coloured 'eye-brows' it's so ugly .and i guess it doesnt suit you at all.grow p,and never expect anything from anyone kays? hope you take care of yourself and please...im cool (:

Never say no.. never say yes...anything can happen you'll never know..we just have to wait for the right time you bet.I've always been waiting,but never do anything to express..

haha-iya

2009-03-15T22:27:00.000-07:00

okay.. first of all, been bored at home, ohh ohh !! now let me just say, im in SCHOOL!! hahah waiting for my dearest Hamidah to end her class at 6???it's okay further more my friends are all back at home resting or should i say sleeping? hah ! its okay.. hahha i rather stay in school then to go home and do nothing siaa. kay. i havent play soccer for about a week, plus? and yeah , today got soccer training.hmm on wednesday they got a game again to play, but awfully im not playing. IT'S OKAYY !! hmm.. again and again, lots of test i have to do, like this coming thursday i have my chem test and the next day friday i have my IFS class test , hurhur^^

OMGOSH !! i can't wait for my belove cousin to come to my school, as at least ive got a friend to tease most of the time, heh~ sorry fizah :D not sure to exactly which course she's getting into, but i bet ill see her around and maybe have lunch with her too?ohyeah.. LOL.

i wat to buy my own new boots and finally ive got my own black socks heh, i know there nothing big to talk bout , but i really wish to have my own boots sia....and my own shin guards, and yes! this coming thursday i get to play soccer with my two brothers, not gona mention who, but im excited bout it.haha yeah.. let's see who can play well, and maybe i can get free coaches? FREE COACHES,kk stop it gurl!

next.i've been really thinking bout my future with some of the stuff happening now that really made me think . i really want to have a future so that i can help my parents in any ways be it going to be like hell or heaven. my aim after this it to poly, cause right now im in ite simei, next stop poly, and maybe if god permit i want to go upgrade and into unii?we'll see bout that just pray to god for the best. :D

kk im so bored now i think im gona just watch a movie on you tube, and have fun before my time runs out, take care and see ya around aite , ill update more later at home aite, i hope ill enjoy my training later at the field, yahoo, soccer !!!! haha kk gtg now

BYEE!!

hurhur^^

2009-03-14T02:28:00.001-07:00

first of all,HAPPY BELATED BIRTHDAY AMIRAH :D congrats to soccer teammates and myself.CE has been winning the match and keep it up seniors, but heck with NUS, we draw sial. 1-1. it's okay. myself scored kinda good marks for phase test and other test.

Just looking forward to meet up with idra and temi and hang out !looking forward to play in the next game. && looking forward to give my abg a surprise. Schools getting boring at times,but overall i do have to to study, heh ~ Just need to catch up alot sehh.like yaa.

My mp4 chargers is spoiled, fcuk lah!now cannot charge siot.Monday got training, like dah lama tk gi training, hahah.My next sports im gona play is FLOORBALL .. gerek kn?so then i can friends here and there, like floorball i have filzah and aqilah, soccer have midah,huda and alot lah byk byk lorrr..

Have fun at batam yan ! work hard for attachment idra ! happy holidays seniors ! happy training afiqah ! aku nk lappy lahh oiikk !!

BYEE!! (:

HOOYEAH !!

2009-02-27T22:09:00.000-08:00

my god.congrats to ITE CE, we won against Meridian JC ,but Meridian JC did well to, over all it was a friendly match,score was 7-0. it's alright, they're not our real opponents tho.Surprisingly,my senior in secondary school were in their team, wooh! hi munirahh !!.we all were shock yet hapy. cause previous match didnt do quite well.okayy okayy,if you don't know what im talking about ,im talking bout soccer girls(: i played in the first game and he last game.got whacked but ...who cares?hmm.btw my socks are blue colour,hee previous was purple nice right?

went home,feeling tired and happy.went home parents ,were just lazying around,after a while they went out.i've got work to do,take a break and called my abg(: went online as well. but was away.chit chat with my abg till 9.30? and he wants to eat, so called back again at 10.00? and chatted till 12.30,gosh i was so tired and sleepy as i was waiting for my mum with the food she bought for me,cause im freaking HUNGRY!!!hahah not eating dinner but supper? cool yeah..after eating rested for awhile and went to sleep,but gosh i couldn't sleepa t all till about 3? and today woke up at 1? nyahahaha tired bodoh!!mum cooked sweet and sour fish fillet,sedap oik! haha now my turn abg!!*thatwas extra information only*

hmm now just resting and blogging,well much to write but lazy larhhsss...k i still haven't check the result of my testes,put up at t06-06 haha, my class lab number(: hmm i hope i pass ,like ya...
kk getting hungry now,have to EAT!!eat only you know uh fiqa,HAHAHA, to you guys also, have a good lunch aite (:

nabeyy....

2009-02-23T02:19:00.000-08:00

everything's going "perfect" now ! mum just can't stop nagging,dad always finding fault,brother CHILDISH AND FUCK UP! who the hell are you even if you're in secondary? just fuck off too! still in short pants so don't fucking think that you're always fucking mature.the whole family are actually really fuck'up.

still solving some problems in school.lucky i pass my chemistry test*phew* because of the problems so beating hard in head and thinking too much, my headache is just getting worst.SICK !URGH!

what's wrong.. just what's wrong with the people around me and why's the world turning upside down??maybe this ' challenge' is a bit too big for me to go through.i wanna say sorry to my adik*in school* not my fucking asshole pain in the ass brother! for crying over the phone,and as well as my brother too.

i guess i just need that one to be there and hug me that's all.anyone is able to be that one, but still depends.IM GLAD YOU'VE GOT YOUR STUFF BACK !! leave me! don't come back!

Trying hard

2009-02-22T04:32:00.000-08:00

uhm.. today was nothing much?...parents noticed its not me as said, been few days?...tmr have to get my ass back to school. not sure if i could even smile or walk around looking at some people's faces.but i have to.

Had lunch at about 4?watched IP man,felt abit bitt better,mum asked to watch our holiday videos dad found while clearing the study room,that video fyi, was 10 YEARS BACK !i felt very touched and cried to see me young and how different i've changed .and so.. everyone's on their own.now me blogging.the rest watching shark's tale?blurgh!

to ;
all this while i know i've been hurting your feelings,and im sorry if i've done so.Never thought this could be worst,but at least give me the chance to say the truth and explain everything,i understand you're feeling very hurtful and therefore no other words should be said.I've never had another crush,i swear upon god, but if you still assuming that is going on,i've got no comments.It's hard i know.Some things you said wasnt true.But if all the things you've said are true and that it should happen..i'll do it for you,so that i won't hurt you anymore and so i've payed back all the mistakes i've made,may you tell your problems to your goodfriend or so,i'll accept that,and if you hate me,truly understood.

My feelings now are all crashed too,cause im shock to receive that message,i cried and though i've done it.It's up to you to forgive me or not,do please find some other girl who doesn't hurt your feelings at all,i guess you've wasted your time on me.Thanks for the time spent together and always wishing you all the best in life and success.Do good in your course and never give up.It's best if we both leave each other alone and don't talk at all for now onwards,cause talking to us again will makes things worst but one thing before we go separate ways,i would love to get things cleared first.just give me that time and never you'll see me again.not any drama here but the TRUTH.

If only you'll listen and trust.JUST TRUST...

FUCKED UP

2009-02-21T04:21:00.000-08:00

Recently problems get worst and bigger, tried to solve it but it's just hard to. feeling very stress and all i can do is cry? well friends are helping but i don't feel any better..feeling empty inside no one knows, but looking happy outside its obvious, now another thing i would like to say is that, it's totally up to you, to believe or not, seems im always hurting your feelings do ignore me and enjoy your life, find a new girl, and please forget me in order to not add on the misery.might as well i give up and kill myself.but im trying hard to do t in a proper mature way,thanks for the concern my friends gave, and all i can say is "i'll try..." don't force me or anything.i trying not to do anything stupid, but thanks alot.im all fucked up, and stress and having that all-over-the-place feeling. argh! i've got no comment already lah.. all just cracking up and getting much more miserable.

hmm kay, i guess im really not in the mood to blog, did this post for just kill time while waiting for someone to come online definitely not shafiq! my friend.like what else you've got to say?? let it all out. urgh! im like so not me! not again! kay.. shut up fiqa...from now i'll not be me ad see how it goes..never in my life i've to carry so much responsibilities and sulking here and there and complains here and there.just don't hope anything from me now on.give me time and i'll be okayy.just bare with me and you'll understand.

HEYHO !

2009-02-16T05:18:00.000-08:00

all i can say is my schedule is damn PACKED!!

gosh i received a text from don;t know who, saying got cross country training to tmr to build up our stamina and improve on our timing for the inter-ite cross country, like whoaa!!! haiyammaaa, now i must get my fullest rest because tmr cross country training, wednesday soccer training and thursday my pe 2.4 and on friday i ahve my either game or training for soccer again and maybe on saturday im having my soccer training again, wtf!! my legs are gona break apart soon you know!

kay. my phase test are coming up on this coming thursday... gosh not sure whether is IFS or CHEM phase test , walao weh, i feel 'all-over-the-place' you know.kay i have to study or else i'll FAIL !! :S

and if aqilah give me that contacts, THANKS AQILAH,ILOVEYOU BABY!!.. HAHAH getting my new contact this friday yeepee!! gerek kn???? k dh i gtg for now bye see ya...

HEYHO!

2009-02-13T05:37:00.000-08:00

HEYHO! haha, sorry for not updating regularly..been busy lahh...got few to update too :D no worries..hee~

I've been in the grey mood thee few days,not knowing why, till i guess may have hurt someone other peoples feeling? Shit, im sorry guys, just don't whats wrong with me and not realizing anything when im in the greys....

Ohh! yesterday's cross country was awesome, achieved something which me and aqilah thought of and what ive wanted to also.first time of my life got the top 20 position among all the B girls runners, that's 17 okayy!! hahah i didn't actually sprint all the way but i did stop here and there and not stop to rest but did brisk walk*winks* so still moving!!haa... prize of it was a goodie bag of college east jersey*sleeve-less and fbt shorts* nice colour ..i'll show you kay...

today,supposedly to be greys,but friends cheered me up and let it all out to soccer?well didn't exactly get to concentrate on the game we had just. soccer girls for college east against bishan team, gosh... bishan gals, were very good and can't stand one of them which more to a guy then to a girl, wondering if he/she gotten into the wrong team or category.'coach was still proud of us and yeah, we'll try harder aite !! :S

hmm.. had a great chat with my friend, and so well see what's next aite ? haa~

i gotta take enough rest now! i have to! i'e been awake and not giving my body the rest it needed! three days straight excercising hard and now's the time to sleep and rest!!

righttt....

2009-02-09T02:02:00.000-08:00

kay about the problem between parents children thingy, was such a bad idea, didnt know who i was, but everything is trying to get back to normal as long as i promise myself to control the "other-afiqah" inside me?... fuck it !

kay, sadly, i manage myself to understand the cum-pli-ceh-terd chemistry methods and equation to doo.. =.=" haish and to be honest, that was my first time listening to Mr Ng during chemistry lesson like prac uh..oh yeah that's only a topic im dizzing about, till have got more to come ! and kancong-ly and last minute-ly, tmr i have my exam on argh! is at 9am and at T06-06, well just have to assemble there, kana study liao tonight, i never even pay any attention to what Miss Loh was mumbling about all this while.!! kk, not gona sleep till i get all the summeries in head and finally sleep*hope to not forget all the summerized stuff in my sleep* im serious!!hmm this is only IFS not yet chemistry which tried learing. well i just hope i can concentrate and revising notes otw to school babeh!!!

mostly likely i went crazy in school cause i drank redbull and coke?? nyahaha ! i saw something which i shouldnt be seeing and waiting to see at. nahh.. you don't have to know peeps. but also crazy on focusing siaaa!! nabeyyy!! well lucky today in school im happy and not in the grey mood. but weirdly my friends don't ge me? it's okay friends. haha...see you people tmr ! take care.

All i have to do now is to limit myself, as an example; my anger, studies and watever that just won't allow me to.i hope my friends will help me through and not a burden.thank you my family 1&2.

fucking shit!

2009-02-07T22:21:00.001-08:00

kay alot of bad things happen recently aite, im not blogging much as either i can't use the com or can't be bothered.first of all, congrats to AFS competitors yesterday who went up for the challenge and make us proud, aysraf,me,ganga,jayvan and iza(: and special thanks also to the supporters; desmond,zi ying,kelly,wen yi,fredrick and if i missed out, thank you guys ! :D...

now's the bad part.yesterday i had a big ugly fight with my own parents it was very ugly, i never behaved like that towards them and i felt very very guilty, it was something i wanted to have but end up chaos.i didnt know who was taking over me, cause i was not myself, it always happen when im angry.i can remember very clearly even if im angry or sad or watever, i dont show and behave like a total another person who my friends dont know.dad told me himself that if i were to get a big scolding from him or any nasty stuff, im gone get sick . and yes, today im fairly sick.i recalled back what had happened last afternoon, and had to explain to them what actually was taking me over.i hope dad understand but im seriously scared of my mum, she burst out yesterday and only after that 'anger' i've stopped make me realize, who was the jerk that took me over? seriously im very upset with myself now and i didnt know what to do. my parents are away now to johor, and when they come back its time for the big game to start again, a big explanation.my hands are cold half a day already. serious shit! i dont whats wrong with me, i've been thinking bout it eversince i've kept alot of problems in my head and pressure going up.

in school may seemed happy but heart not.not showing it, but im sorry if i show or let go.may at time i need time alone, but dont worry bout me, now im in deep shit, and have to convince of my own big mistake. i really hope i wont let this happen again, and not to my parents especially.im sorry papa & mama ):, not gona show or any, but leave me alone for the time being,

ive got lots to update but no mood for it.not sure how long it takes but but just bare with it.leave me alone and ill heal myself, but if i do anything wrong to speak up to me, so i'll realize it, and causing any trouble.thank you. and bye.

tiring day...

2009-01-26T21:18:00.000-08:00

hmm been missing from home for the past three days, another, had fun with cousins when picnic-ed, haha at east coast bodoh!! fun uh, but the thing is that the weather like sod siaaa.kejap drizzling kejap sunny kejap drizzling, siow siaa.rented three bikes for me and fizah and afiq, treat tau!! hahawe only had one hour for each bike, and so we really use that time, we cycled from one end to another pit area.hmm my laps were really cram and tired...hmm. after that.. my brother came with his own bike, and then me and hazirah(niece) decided to much more far end but then, i have to tompang/pillion her, lagi berat siol !!!haha but it was fun sang i hate this part by pussycat along the way, but i guess paiseh uh, bet passerby's heard us :S kk at about 4 we decided to packup and left to visit my mum's auntie and so we visited and her yesterday i reached hoe at about 6.30pm? hahah kk, that day, the morning was really a tiring and boring and afterall the activities done, it was great :D hahaha.. kk im lost now.i'll update more? ohh get to know one friend, she's cool and kind same like her cousin funny and crazzziiieee !!, haha shiok uh talk on phone...kk lahh.. tmr school, got to get my school stuff ready , must pack ! tmr also again wake up early morniing to school report at 8 siaa !!!! kk MATI LOORRRR.. =/

kk take care, bye

haha~

2009-01-22T22:58:00.000-08:00

hmm, okayy this is the end of my third in school, everything seemed okayy, except for some.volunteered to be the class rep:) interesting horr? still havent get my school pants, caught by DM also known as bouncers ! hahah gona get one soon on monday, IT'S A MUST ! im afraid if my record is permanent sehh.hmm ,this week is okayy. one of the days i was darn moody due to some stressing problems,still need to catch up with the chemistry im studying cause... IM LOST !. wth!! you know the most boring part when comes to lecture, very boring you can even play games and reach to the 8th level if you play well. but so far i've learn more interesting stuff during lecture tho. i thought that practical was also fun :Di had fun with my friends also :D and yes ! i get to see my victim again hahah!! k it's time to study too, exams are in june i im not mistaken still i've lots to study.what else?... looking forward to my cca. been waiting when it'll start cause im bored after school, gona need excercise too.

i had no how i eat till i got food spilled on my uniform , seriously .make more friends !!

hurhur^^

2009-01-16T04:38:00.000-08:00

today end school about 12.30? haa ~ had telematch against other schools *courses* lucky and i guess it's the first time my school got second, thanks to us ! :D haha proud of that, met up with idra and more other visited our 'long-lost-secondary-school' TEMASEK SECONDARY SCHOOL ! miss that school very much, meet up with my teacher's had them pranked, haa, and thought they'll knew it was me :( had fun , i really missed Mr Chndramohan siaa !! he my father, heh...we spent about 1 hour there? k then off home, everyone slit up and home.went home with idra, pity she had to drop at tanah merah, k nvm. so i reached home.AREP ! called him and asyraf too but most of the time arep, haha had fun he's a very 'busy' man you know. haha arep arep...kk..also called temi, had alittle frustration about the phone just now, hahaha...k monday reporting time is at 8 MATI SIAA.. mls seh nk bgn.. haiyoo ...dh tu tukar timetable plak sehh...k luh i also got nothing else to say.. i'll update soon kayy.. thanks for the support and everything AFS PEEPS,proud we won second ! try harder and grab those trophy's next year, we'll be back!

take care bye

hurhur ^^

2009-01-10T01:37:00.000-08:00

wow , school end late always, it's really tiring you know.got lot's to revise, for test? not a easy thing for me. not updating regularly huh... sorry for that. for now, im not feeling well, and my fuking brother is just pissing me off. such a pain in the ass !

hmmm, start school at 8 already after a week.I've been reaching school,either on time or late for 10 minutes, that's bad huh?.. hahaha gotta set a new time now, i have o reach school about 15 minutes earlier... damn it siahh..i just hope i'll have a good day on monday heh.ohh and finally got m lab coat, like nice sia.. when i wear it !!. haha like a scientist :P weird that mum you know changed the ex-link to new ez-link that is able to usse for all. haha i hope i'll get my ite ez-link fast so that it's much more convinient , hahaha, now i know how Mr. Goh is , darn , im feel so guilty sak. k nvm..

Girls, we have to meet up soon and chill !! im missing you girls, already not like i can meet you in school anytime idra, especially you tammie, always looking forward for a meet up and chill .yeh =/,eh lab safety,alot to remember siaa.. kk had fun with my members, i cannot tahan the two belo's , haha, always kasi people pecah perut laughing seh.haha thanks guys.

m now blank, i'll update more aite.take care

im starting to think of you back, and wondering if it's okay to get it clear,may not be able to express out.and hope you get the meesage im trying to give.

new school life..

2009-01-06T16:43:00.001-08:00

Yo !.. first day in school was alright, everyone was still shy and keeping quiet,accept for some who are already "kecoh" and making the rest laughing their ass off. i find my new class was okayy. everyone will be united once, they're suit themselves.For the second day everyone started chilling and crazy too, well it tried joking around so at least the girls in my class are getting themselves together, if not, like tikus, quiet only :S , hahh my lovely class rep is caprio, haha nice name:), treasurer is aqilah, the sweet lady, made new friends like diyana, the feminine one !! and amirah,leonie,shaheed,ahsraf? maybe, and haikal:) amri:) this one like husrin siaa !! arif? hahah firece arh dektu...

that was two days reporting time at 9. today i have to report to shool at 12 and of course, end about 6 lmbt sioll !! haish, this is not yet including cca tau, if together with cca, i bet i'll end even later.haha interested in women's soccer babe!! i joined, and also willing to continue my leadership but this time, student councillor.wonder what's today be like... hahah just see later uh.. now early in the morning im awake cause it's the only chance to use the com and also, get my stuff prepared last night didn't get any ready cause i was too sleepy and very tired.lectures here and there, and maybe today practical siaa...hmm kayy.. nothing else to say.. ohh!! i've found all my ex-temasekians in school ohh i so miss them. but some still not found haha, LOST AND FOUND .

kk till here lahh later if i got time i'll update more okayys..
ILL NEVER FORGET MY BESTFRIEND, TEMILIA AND IDRA OF COURSE, YOU'RE STILL MY BESTFRIENDS.TRUST ME :)

"adventure's "

2009-01-02T06:00:00.000-08:00

oh !! and another thing, i've found a very special thing that, happened to me twice, that is so, unbelievable yet, very killing.haish, it was damn long , thought my number was kept for a later meet up.temi was about to fly actually but i told her not to.. cause if she flies, i will not be able to catch her as she's fast you know, like the cullen's ohh actually she's one of them..

when she fly....
i'll not have a flen...
and i cannot flyy....

so i was almost turning into a werewolves but i hold on, as i know my number will be next, and though it wouldn't be to that special i've found, then sekali ah... i got it AGAIN!!, i was freaking shock and quickly run up to the table and get my stuff.. hhahaha just can't stop smiling when i see the meat i normally eat.haish,i played around with the meat, and it was awesome i bite it, finish it off, and left.and soon, tammie cullen, was gona fly as she was hungry.. so since i can't fly, she hold me and fly together with her uh...... omgarr , she flew real fast and i can hardly see a thing.then finally she got her food in front of her, she was as hungry as ever,chicken's were flying everywhere, hard to catch up you know.kayy. that was when our meal time.

after that, we had fun still finding victims , but as for me, the first meat i had was the best and hoping to have it again, as for my friend cullen.she'll have to find a new fresh one !!.. hahaha. seriously just stay away from her so she won't bite you or get aggressive, cause i've got bitten from her, it's terrifying, the marks still there. but lucky im a well defender.HAHAHAHA

that's all peeps.not sure if i can continue,if there's anymore nice hunting well , sure ! :D

If you beleive to what you've just read,very well good, cause it really happened,TO ME !!
trust me

new year...

2009-01-02T05:15:00.000-08:00

not too late to pose this right?

HAPPY NEW YEAR ; 2009!!

hmm, time do past by real fast huh... im already in ite and other upgrading too:D to friends out there, do achieve your new year resolutions aite..hmm 2008 has been a great and also bad year for me, i've learn alot and so experience alot. i'll try not to have the past repeated and get a better future ahead.hmm 2008 is the year when i'll leave most of the things behind.and ths year 2009 when i start a new one, with new stuff.

so today hanged out with temi. followed her to her "registration" it was fun, at first i have got curfew, but in the end mum changed her mind, so i was FREE!! yayy!!, hahah we hanged out till like 2.30? and then i left home to get changed and fetch my brother from school.temi and i been hanging out for about two days after a day, and hope she'd fun at my place.hah one of the hang out we meet up with idra, but sadly i have to leave and they went to chin cher's chalet i think.IM SORRY CHIN CHER I COULDNT MAKE IT:(

monday's first day of school, haa! first day in ite, bet it'll gona be a big moment for me to adapt with.hmm so hard to have the sch pants for my uniform and lucky i have a pants that look most likely like the sch female pants, my course require the female student to wear uniform, and also my lab coat, i wonder how will i look in that lab coat, hah... smart? nerd? short? crappy? idontknow we'll see bout that, made a friend,get to know her for a day and acting like we've known since sec one..NICE KNOWING YOU CHING LI :D haha special thanks to dawin, match maker,btw it's a she alright.

for now how i wish i can be by tammie's side and hug her to tell her that im always her friend and always willing to help her, be strong temi....i know you can get through this..

alright ! that's all for today.. update soon, im very tired it's a whole day thingy lerhhs...

How i wish i can actually make the move and without me keep on complaining and end up got blame bout it.stop being stuck up,and im not like that when im about to go secondary level also, just don't try to act smart or anything, i've lot to say than you.just don't test my patience.

watever it take luhh

2008-12-28T18:59:00.000-08:00

hmm kay,yesterday , was a pissing day,just couldn't accept some things.To my brother,just don't try to talk bout being independent and having a room, cause i got alot to bring up and you'll loose for sure ! just dont try huh ! diar-ed haha just to release myself.. k forget it...

today some of my friend's interview for their courses, GOOD LUCK GUYS !!. register-ing mine on the 2nd Jan.. sians luh.. school reopening siaa... im just waiting for temi.

Now im kinda bored,this morning saw something i havent' eat for a long time... MAGGII !! i miss maggi !! yeah that's freaky.but hell yeah, gona eat soon.no plan today but going out for while to do something. haish, hope to hang out soon.been rotting at home like shit larhh!!

parents working hours are changed since then, just hope we communicate more and don't be left out.next year everyone is going to be busy with their own things, and lack of communiation.i just miss the past times.cause not everyday, when parents come home, they're in a good mood.always nagged by mum,as usual, nah.i hope everything will be fine starting 2nd January.

im still waiting for my new phone, nvm just be patient sehh..&& imissyoualready :(

FINALLY !!

2008-12-27T01:30:00.000-08:00

hanged out with my bestfriends :D Supposingly to meet up at 11.30 but all was delayed, as one caught up with traffic jams? one on the way from dancing? haha and as for me, pissed with "so-smart" auntie again cause because of her, i got the bom ! again i was being patient, k nvm.had fun, again supposed to be watching movie, but obeying some rules, we didn't, just eat lunch and walk around, HAHA, we played arcade, im sure all of us enjoyed that, we had on our " bike race" idra got 8th position, temi got 3rd, fiqa got 5th at first and second race was 3rd, my brother, got 1st at first and then got 6th for the second race.IT WAS VERY FUNN YOU KNOW! haha .

we didn't took alot of pics, only two..? vat the hell..it's okayy im sure we can meet up again. all the plans planned was crashed, hmmrsss. but its okayy... we compromised:) and so , gotta plan for the next hang out jyeahs girls ?!..haha going ngaji yeah !! *watever sahh*ohh idra, can we meet up when we're off for registration cause gotta send afiq to sch, for the first day , haish yaa.....

kk update more soon aite...
take care,bye

ohmygosh!

2008-12-26T03:59:00.000-08:00

today was a "so-call' the second big day, cause course result are out, and pooosshh!! i've got it man ! i've got applied food science with me baby ...wooyeahh :D. Just have to register later between 31st dec and 2 Jan. that's five days away?blurgh okayy . but im always willing to help temi, you know this girl.all the best to you and see you soon.

mum came back home from work and hurried me off to get her t-shirt that she sent for alteration,and buy some stuff. tuition students came,very embarrassing happened.she was very angry that the "so-smart" auntie altered her t-shirt wrongly and that t-shirt she bought not long ago during shopping at queensway , haven't touch,not yet worn, but it's all spoiled. and the best part was, i was also being scolded*what did i do wrong siaaa?*dad got home, i ate dinner,mum hurried me to go back and complain if not pay back !! whoaa. im not even sure if i could sound like how my mum was before i left home.i was all fed up with the unnecessary scolding.i went down after gobbling up the food which i was trying to enjoy with.kayy. lucky no big fight happened ,were given a free 'put-back' so it looks original? watever, its gona be ugly i say.

OHYEAHS!! tomorrow might be my day out !! have to catch a movie yeah girls?hhaha im so excited, but i hope that will really happen.dont worry gals, listened to mum and did everything!. hmm now the problem is..how am i suppose to get idra? susah lah diaaa.... kk i'll kol..im sure we're gona have fun girls.

take care,bye

bitter

2008-12-23T17:22:00.000-08:00

Okayy it's kinda early i blogged but i edited.woke up much more earlier today.Have to decide what am i gona have for lunch.always bored, and watched twilight again.teehee.surprisingly door bell rang and mum's home !! normally she will come back around 6.30 and the reason was it's christmas eve, they're off early.but she's out again,for some facial thingy.haha me trying to improve on my face to haha, did i just write that.

______________

Kayy now's the thing, something just confused me and kinda pissing to think bout it.got pranked and that's the worst i've ever face.The biggest mistake was to listen to guys sweet talks !.i can't imagine how many girl's you've done that to.never im gona believe anybody's words that i dont know that well.good that i've explain what ever happened before he could even accuse more.and not contacting anymore.that who did it, THANKS ALOT !

that's all
take care,bye

OH GREAT !!

2008-12-22T21:31:00.001-08:00

hmm.. guess im on my own now, one down, but it's okayy, i know that this happen for my own good too. so that i won't torture anyone or anybody more. for now jsut got to hope for the best of my upcoming post result. it was confusing andhard to get it clear , but i guess it won't happen. im fine now, just need alittle activity to do.boredboredbored, need to go out,hang out with my buddies.hmm i hope this coming 26th after result i can go out for a movie, yeah tammie?hmm ajak idra too and some other.sometimes i think isit good to have one or just stay as it is, but already had one and not too good.hmm i was just afrd it might happen, and yes, hurhur.it's okayy it'll much better in the future maybe,still friends we are.but not as close,we will? idontknow,we'll see how.andand hope to see you soon. hahah next year ! :D hahaha i got my course!yay!kk dh.idra you look like a cute santa claus actually,you're the only small one, haha i couldn't find you actually untill i move nearer abit, but you look cute.hah.your manager wasn't that happy i think,fierce uh:S kk i'll try not to come near again . tammie wasn't sure if your office was already open or nt sorry gal !

kk from now on just stay focus and not tricked again.gona have fun always,stay happy and chill.what you have now, do treasure and don loose it, cause if you loose it , it'll not be pretty.haha i love you, i miss you, i need you , i hate you, i kick you, i punch you. good? ihadnoideawhatimwritingactually.

take care friends:D

HMMM

2008-12-22T19:53:00.000-08:00

kayy. got lots to update.
receive results on the 18dec,was okayy.went school like three times straight,result,brothers registration,and buying of new books.past few days was confusing actually, i had a good time and bad times too.within those days was trying to get my courses confirmed and submit when idra told me that last day is today i think, temilia and i quickly decide and subit yesterday, gosh now waiting for the result was scaryy too you know.

hmm, missing my friends already, gona hang out soon yeah?one thing i got to say is that no one is perfect, and she tried her best to please everyone but then, i guess her way wasn't pleasing enough,tried to change but alittle hard yet can be done.she always think that maybe she wasn't meant for any body at all, but yeah not at all..that's her and always her, if you dont like it tell her and she will know what to do.

i've been going out with parents for a week straight, it was really tiring but still fun,went shopping and bought new stuff, im just waiting for my new hp now. heh,like my hoodie.urgh ! am i even ready to go to the next step? i dont know, heh :s school reopening soon, lots of preparation's to do.hahaha.aiseylahhh !!...

kk..haha taken lots of pics, gotta put up soon. but im lazy, k nvm..i'll would love to hang out with my buddies real soon, keep contact yeah, see you in our new sch babes !!

I'm sorry it turns out this way, but im trying my best to say,i never meant to let it out but i think that's the best to let it out.well let's see what's next and hope you'll understand.im not forcing you but what ever it is if i were to say it no one even you could understand